Tourist: Hey look, it's 42nd Street! They named it after a Broadway show. –Times Square Overheard by: Really? REALLY!?! Tourist dad, as shuttle to Grand Central comes in: No! We need to take the purple to Grand Central Station, then the green! –Times Square Shuttle Platform Overheard by: D-Law Male tourist, watching stranger propose underneath Christmas tree: Hey buddy, did you go to Jared? –Rockefeller Center Southern tourist lady, as subway stops: Oh no, I think the train ran out of gas! –F Train Overheard by: Matt Southern tourist: I guess the birds ate all the hands off the statues. –The Cloisters, Harlem Overheard by: M@
Girl: Yeah, we followed him off the bus and got lost, and that’s why I swore I’d never leave Manhattan again. –Port Authority Bus Termnal Overheard by: J. Tro
Asian girl: That reminds me of those dogs that have to wear the cones around their neck.
Asian boy: What’s that for, anyway? To project the bark? –Port Authority Overheard by: DA
Chick #1: Like I lost 18 pounds, does it show?
Chick #2: Yeah! How did you do it?
Chick #1: I stop eating at 4 every day.
Chick #2: Wow, is that healthy?
Chick #1: I dunno, it works. It started when my trainer said,
“Bitch, you’re fat. Face it, your BMI is too high.” –Port Authority ladies’ room Overheard by: Bibi B Woman: So I asked him, “How come I make 3 million dollars a year and you still don’t want me?” And he said, “Because you are a fat fucking cow!” –Astor Place Overheard by: bogica
Woman: You on the buses?
Woman: You can’t trust nobody on buses. ‘Specially when you sleepin’. You know how to hide yo’ money, girl?
Girl: In my pocket?
Woman: No. In yo’ pussy an’ yo’ ass. Ain’t nobody touchin’ yo’ pussy without you noticin’! –Port Authority
JAP on cell: Yeah, he’s cute, but he’s from Staten Island!…Ever see that show on MTV, True Life: I’m Getting Married? Yeah, that guy was such trash, and everyone out there is like that! –Port Authority Overheard by: Rebecca Dash
Woman #1: I thought you loved me — didn’t last night mean anything to you?
Woman #2: I do love you, that’s why I let you swallow my babies. –43rd & 8th Overheard by: Elan
Man #1: Someone took a shit in the sink.
Man #2: It happens. This is New York. –Men’s Room, Port Authority
Woman #1: So you never finished telling me that story about whatshisname…Come over here and tell me while I dookie.
Woman #2: Uh…
Woman #1: What? Don’t act like I don’t tell you shit while you’re on the toilet! –Port Authority ladies’ room Overheard by: elizabeth kim