Archive for the ‘Preggers’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Used the Rhythm Method

Girl: Last time you told me something was overrated I got pregnant. –Sephora, Broadway Overheard by: linzz Guy: … So then she changed her middle name to something like "Afterbirth…" –Spring St Overheard by: boston bobby College guy on cell: He was like, ‘Shit, she’s got a bun in the oven!’ And I was like, ‘Oh, shit!’ –Columbia University Overheard by: roo Chick: She said he talked to her on the phone and that’s how he got her pregnant. –Barnes & Noble, Union Square Overheard by: Wondering how that works Preggers: I’m gonna across this street against the light, pregnant and all, and I’m not gonna have a miscarriage. –Eastern Pkwy & Classon Ave, Crown Heights, Brooklyn Employee to another: I only gained two pounds during my pregnancy, and I’m on my seventh month! –Burger King, 5th Ave, between 36th & 37th Overheard by: EE Grimshaw NYU girl on cell: … So then the doctor comes in and he goes, ‘Houston, we have a problem…" I know, right? What’s with doctors trying to be all funny when they’re telling you that you’re pregnant? –NYU bus Overheard by: tj

Going Back to His Wife in Scarsdale

Ghetto chick: I’m pregnant
Thug: So?
Ghetto chick: What do you mean, "So"?
Thug: Shouldn’t you be having this conversation with your husband
Ghetto chick: And tell him what, that I cheated and got pregnant?
Thug: No, but you can tell him to pay for the abortion or he’ll be raising my kid, if it’s even mine.
Ghetto chick: What the fuck do you mean if it’s yours?
Thug: Bitch please! I’m a pimp, look I gotta go–you and your husband figure it out.
Ghetto chick: Where the fuck you think your going?
Thug: Bitch, I don’t answer to you. I’m out. –875 3rd Ave Overheard by: splashmaster