Flamboyant hipster Latino to straight-looking Latino boyfriend: Someday he'll call you daddy, and then all hell is gonna break loose.
–Ave C & 16th St
Lady to nine-year-old boy: I hate to tell you, but your dad is in jail. He owes me a lot of money!
Guy on cell: Yeah, look, I told you. Your bail was set at $18,000. The bail bondsman wants 10%. Where the fuck am I supposed to get $1,800 to bail your sorry ass out of jail? (pause) Yeah, I love you too, dad.
–33rd St b/w 7th & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Jason
FedEx delivery guy on cell: How the hell did Halle Berry get pregnant without me being the father?
Overheard by: janine