Archive for the ‘Prostitution’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Love You Long Time

Cop to 7-Eleven employee: Man, I saw the hottest hooker last night!

–23rd St

White guy: People in Boston really like whoremongering, I guess.

–Park Slope

Overheard by: Ladle

Man on cell: But I'm the best escort in the country!

–Chelsea

Man on cell: I used to pay for hookers.

–10th St & 2nd Ave

Overheard by: nomo

Man on phone: The Caribbean thing… No, not the prostitute.

–Fulton St

Thugette to boyfriend: You don't have to go to Vegas to get a hooker, honey, you can just go to Atlantic City.

–Staten Island Ferry

Which Reminds Me– I Owe You Fifty Bucks.

Student: What about sex?
Economics professor: What about it?
Student: Well, it's something that probably never has a diminishing marginal utility.
Economics professor: You wish. (class laughs) Plus, for most of us in this room, sex isn't usually a market transaction.

–Columbia University

Overheard by: Danielle

I Found Your Memoirs, Mom

Hyper small child: I like standing up!
Sitting harried mother: Great.
Small child: Look! I'm twirling!
Harried mother: That's wonderful.
Small child: I know all about the world!
Harried mother: You are very smart.
Small child: I know all about science! I know all about geishas!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Sarah

Every Wednesday One-Liner Has Its Price

Woman to another: She had one baby at her breast and another baby sitting next to her, trying to sell chicklets.

–10 Rockefeller Plaza

Overheard by: Jarrod

Young man to young woman: Sell it on the black market or give it up for adoption. That's basically your only two options.

–Grand St, Chinatown

Overheard by: Mike Posillico

Crazy woman to entire bus: My husband be given my money to all those hoes. That's why I gotta sell coffee. But at least I'm not sellin' my ass… (gets distracted by radio) Oh, this is a nice song.

–Bx15 Bus

Overheard by: Karly

Father of four, attempting herd jumping children on street: Okay, the next child that doesn't listen to me will be sold!

–34th & 3rd

Overheard by: Dahouhou

Midwestern lady tourist to husband: Huh, Virgin. I wonder what they sell there.

–14th St, across Doomed Megastore

Overheard by: Not buyin what they're sellin