Archive for the ‘Race’ Category

You Won’t Be Laughing When the “Juicy” Diet Takes America by Storm

Drunk black woman #1: No, you gotta put cocoa butter on your legs and drink water. Water keeps your body juicy!
Drunk black woman #2: Jui-cy! Bam-bam!
Drunk black woman #1: That’s right, water keeps you juicy… [Sees young Asian woman smiling at them] Oooh, she know what I’m talkin’ about! She exotic… She an Asian girl.
Drunk black woman #2: Bam-bam!
Drunk black woman #1: Yeahhh… She know what I’m talkin’ about… Oh, shit, it’s our stop… Thank God, because I’m ’bout to squat down somewhere! [Both stagger off train.]

–1 train

Overheard by: amused

At Least He’s Honest

Little girl: Daddy, what’s wrong with Chinese people? Why do they never smile?
Dad: It’s because they’re robots.
Little girl: What about black people? Are black people robots?
Dad: No, not that I’m aware of.

–4 train

Overheard by: Audrey

Wednesday Conga Liners

Man on cell: Yeah, so do you know that show Dancing with the Stars? They got the idea for it from the camera in my shower.

–6th Ave & 55th St

Overheard by: Alicia

Aging badass to lady friend: Yeah, I totally got escorted out of a Tom Petty concert for dancing in the aisles.

–17th St & 5th Ave

Overheard by: Original Badass

Black guy: Hey everybody! Stop what you're doing! There's two black guys about to dance on this train! That's something you don't see often!

–A Train

Flamboyant gay man to friend: You can't sashay in there. There's no room to sashay at all.

–Outside LGBT Community Center, during Fur Ball

Overheard by: pandarants

Drunk Asian girl: It's always time to dance in North Korea.

–2nd St & Ave B