Archive for the ‘Rack’ Category

Guess That Explains Why Your Grades Have Started to Sag

Loud Dominican kid #1: Yo, that girl Adriana…
Loud Dominican kid #2: Who, that white girl?
Loud Dominican kid #3: Yeahhhh, with the big titties?
Loud Dominican kid #1: Yeaaahhh, she was, like, leaning over helpin' me with a problem and I was like “yeaaahhhh…”
Loud Dominican kid: Word?
Loud Dominican kid #2: She got like c-cups…
Loud Dominican kid #3: Wait, I don't, like, know the alphabet…

–L Train

Overheard by: Larson

Boys Don't Wednesday One-Liner

Mom to small children: Well, we all have parts. And these parts talk to our bodies and tell us we are a boy or a girl. And sometimes these parts get confused.

–Washington Square East

20-something girl to male friend: You're a dirty girl! You're a dirty girl! You're a dirty girl!

–N Train

Overheard by: TR

Mother to gender-transitioning son, questioning plans for surgery: Are you a boy trapped in a girl's body? I'm getting a face lift, and it's because I'm a young person trapped in an old person's body.

–39th & 9th

Man in yellow and green track suit and aviator sunglasses: Nah, I can't go. That's when I'm having my breast reduction.

–Columbus Circle

Overheard by: Ems

Teenage boy: I don't wanna be on that block, son! I know too many trannies on that block!

–Bedford & Grove

Overheard by: How many is too many?

Guy on cell, leaving message: Hello, Dave. This is your mother.

–Tisch School of the Arts

Overheard by: Bruce Lee

Teen boy: Fear me, I have vaginitis!

–Staten Island Ferry

Overheard by: Jingles

Wednesday Funbag-Liners

Teenage girl: Ohmigod. Doesn't she know that the "having big boobs" thing is, like, not in anymore?

–86th St

Overheard by: Kevin

Girl to another: It splashed on my boob… Then he slurped it off!

–Charles & 4th

Overheard by: Eric

20-something guy, singing: I wanna touch some boobs. I wanna touch some boobs. I wanna touch some boobs. I wanna find my motherfucking sock, 'cause I don't know where it is. I wanna touch some boobs…

–Pratt Institute

Angry hobo to college chick with big boobs zipping up her jacket: Don't put them titties away!

–5th & 21st

Elderly woman to husband: I keep my business in my bosom!

–Carnegie Deli

…Look– I Can Make Them Dance!

Hot schoolgirl to plain friend: I think my boobs are getting bigger.
(every guy in the train looks)
Plain friend
: Ummm, you said that a bit loud…

Hot schoolgirl: No, seriously, look! (cups boobs) They're bigger! They're like under my chin now. Every time I look down I get surprised, because they're just so there!
Plain friend, embarrassed: Please shut up until we're off this train.
Hot schoolgirl, looking up: Huh, what? I missed that, I was distracted by my boobs.

–1 Train