Archive for the ‘Relationships’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners You Can Take Home to Mom

20-something gal: I didn’t really like him, I just wanted a boyfriend. –Fulton & Gold Overheard by: Craig, Marykate and Maryanne 20-something girl on cell: What, my boyfriend? Oh, he’s with his wife tonight. –Remsen & Clinton, Brooklyn Flamboyantly gay man (to himself): He’s just jealous because I have a new boyfriend! –Times Square Overheard by: Liz French woman, earnestly: I’m okay with him sleeping with my boyfriend as long as he starts paying for his own drinks. –1020 Bar, 110th & Amsterdam Overheard by: Ladle Hipster bike punk: I call her my special lady friend and she calls me her gentlemen caller… because boyfriend and girlfriend are too possessive. –Mud Bar, East Village Overheard by: raf

10 Bucks on the Guy from Bed-Stuy

Black chick #1: I’ma see one of my boyfriends today.
Black chick #2: You got more than one?
Black chick #1: Hells yeah. One live in Bed-Stuy, the other live in Canarsie.
Black chick #2: That’s gangsta. –Locker room, John Dewey High School, Brooklyn Overheard by: Just trying to get dressed

Wednesday One-Linered…With Children

Old Jewish woman to very nervous Asian 25-year-old bride to be: Honey, I've been married 53 years. The secret to a great marriage? Give him lots of sex. Lots of good sex. –Dumbo, Brooklyn Overheard by: Tanya Man on cell: I told her I would convert. We could go to Vegas and get married next week, no problem. –64th & Amsterdam Woman on phone: My ex-boyfriend was 24 and he was able to support me, and you're 35 on an engineer's salary and you can't do the same. Do you know how many guys are begging to marry me, and can give me a dowry? So fuck you! –Target Store, Brooklyn Hispanic woman on phone: So where are you now? You already married him? Oh, okay. See you later. –28th & Park Avenue South Overheard by: Alie Five-year-old boy to teacher about five-year-old girl next to him: We're going to get married. (to five-year-old girl) What's your name again? –61st & Amsterdam

Wednesday One-Liners Click “It’s Complicated”

Chick: It’s about your cyber personality, and if your cyber personality doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me on Facebook, that’s okay! –NYU Hayden Staircase Coed: I don’t know… if Sheryl* with the two kids by the two different baby-daddies can have a good MySpace, I think pretty much anyone should be able to do it. –Hunter College Overheard by: ImmaculatePizza Hipster girl: It looks like MySpace exploded in there! –The Knitting Factory, 74 Leonard St Overheard by: Cassie 20-something girl: So, the quadriplegic I hooked up with added me as a friend on Facebook last night. –Chipotle, 51st & 8th Geek prophet: No one is ever away from Google, really. –Near Holland Tunnel Overheard by: Claire H. Angry chick, to boyfriend: Look, I’m not changing my Facebook status! –6th & Ave A Overheard by: Kremilyse 30-ish woman: I said I wouldn’t date him ’til he gets rid of the typos on his MySpace profile… Am I a snob? –Tom’s Diner, Morningside Heights Overheard by: ball-and-veining tool

Oh, These Guys Would Respect You Like Crazy

Asian yuppie: I’m so tired of his bullshit. I’m done. Like seriously. Who the fuck tells his ex: “Hey, I’m going to ask this chick out, you think it’s a good idea?” That bastard!
White yuppie: Wow, no respect at all.
Asian yuppie: I know.
White yuppie: We should go out for drinks, I know a lot of guy friends who would do anything to have sex with you.
Asian yuppie: I don’t need to get laid…
White yuppie: Blasphemy!
Asian yuppie: Ok. You’re right, maybe I do need to get laid. –Grand Central Station