Gentile Yuppie: When I was in the synagogue, all of these girls kept on coming up to me and trying to pick me up–but they were all Jewish!
Archive for the ‘Religion’ Category
Obviously Reformed
A Gentile Yuppie: I once dated a Rabbi’s daughter, in the Hamptons. I went to a family barbeque, and he asked me, ‘Do you want cheese on your hamburger?’ and I thought, ‘Ah–this is a moment of truth–one of those key moments in a relationship, where the family will judge me–what should I say?’ and I said, ‘Yes, I would’–and then the Rabbi responded, ‘Great! Then Cheese for Everybody!’” – Bar Tabac, Boerum Hill, Brooklyn
Without a Yarmulke
Young Yuppie: You’re such a third-generation American Jew. – 6th Avenue, West Village
The New York Marginalized
Columbia University student #1: The most marginalized group on campus are the college Republicans
Columbia University student #2: No, it’s the Christians
– Private get-together of Columbia students, East Village
A Jewish Hipster? For Real?
Hipster Girl: Hipsterism was made for Jewish guys and Asian Girls. – Williamsburg
Take, Eat, This is My Body
Girl #1: My friend Chandra thinks she’s still a virgin because she’s only had anal sex.
Girl #2: How do you know this girl?
Girl #1: She goes to my church.
–New York Public Library, 40th & 5th
Overheard by: Renee Rogers
You know you’re Not in New York when… (Part 3)
Four teenagers in a convertible at a stop-sign speaking about me as I cross the street right in front of them, in Vancouver: “Hey, he looks Jewish!”
Happy J Year!
Suit #1: It’s the same judge that decided that the menorah and the islamic symbols are not religious, but that the cross is. And guess what? The judge?
Suit #2: Jewish?
Suit #1: Jewish.
–Madison & 44th
Taking a Knife is the new Taking a Bullet
Guy: Yo, it’s not like a religion or nothin’. More like a nation, really. I’m tellin’ you, we got our own rules. We respect each other.
Girl #1: Are you sure it’s not a religion?
Guy: Nah. Like for example, if some guy tried to stab my friend, I’d jump in and take that blade for him. I’d do that for him.
Girl #2: That’s respect.
–B Train
Overheard by: Dominic
We Call It “Little Israel”
Guy: So you guys are Jewish?
Girl: Yeah, why?
Guy: Are you from Brooklyn? I live there now, and there are a lot of Jewish people there.
Girl: No, we’re from Staten Island.
Guy: Oh. Are there a lot of Jewish people there?
–Finnerty’s, Union Square area
Overheard by: Becka Dash