Archive for the ‘Rumor Has It’ Category

… Until His Parents Died

Girl #1: Remember that one guy I dated? He was one of those people that said weird things like, ‘I’m gonna get really rich when my parents die.’
Girl #2: … Is that supposed to impress you?
Girl #3: I dunno, but he was an asshole.

–The Knitting Factory, 74 Leonard St

Overheard by: Hana

Thanks, Brainiac — Now We’ll Never Know What His Cock Was Like

Blonde sex addict: I mean, I met him at my AA meeting. That’s truly what kept me going there.
Brunette sex addict: Hey, whatever keeps you in the program.
Blonde sex addict: Yeah, but after we made love the third time, I just knew he was a survivor of incest, and since I am a survivor I can just tell. I mean, he didn’t tell me or anything, but I knew.
Brunette sex addict: Oh… But was the sex good?
Blonde sex addict: Ohhh, yeah. I mean, it was hot — since we are both addicts. I mean, his cock was sooo–
Father with four young kids, interrupting: –Stop! Have you people no souls?!
Blonde sex addict: … So, yeah — I’ll be at the meeting Friday and Monday, too…

–1 train, after a Sexaholics Anonymous meeting