Archive for the ‘Starbucks’ Category

Lions, and Tigers, and Wednesday One-Liners — Oh My!

20-something woman on cell: Did I tell you mom got into a fight with a raccoon again? (pause) Yeah, I know, our mom is totally going to die of rabies.

–Starbucks, West Village

Overheard by: Vaccinated for rabies

Guy to another: Flap your wings baby, just flap your wings!

–Broadway

Woman, shouting at no one in particular: You know I'm unstoppable! I'm like an ox!

–1 Train

Overheard by: Rose Fox

NYU girl: My mother was like, "what would you do with a giant inflatable turkey?" and I was like, "what wouldn't you do with a giant inflatable turkey?"

–3rd Ave & 14th St

Overheard by: Mickey

If You Have to Ask…

Guy: I just geeked out my profile by a million percent. What do you think?
Girl: Hold up, let me check…
Guy: So what do you think?
Girl: Yeah, that Evangelion child shit is weird.
Guy: Like how weird? –Starbucks, Astor Place Overheard by: Zah

Wednesday One-Liners Burn, Baby, Burn

Queer: Hanging out with him is like doing charity work. –Christopher & Bleecker Overheard by: J. Ann Ghetto girl to thug: You can’t touch this. Keep reminiscin’, mothafucka. –106th & Columbus Overheard by: Shmoop Guy on cell: I’ll be real with you, man. I know more than you. I know a lot more than you. –17th & 5th Altruist: He’s really nice so I just fake it sometimes. –Elevator, 120 Wall St Overheard by: Aubrie Teen girl: She did what? Oh my God, she is, like, so off my top 8. –1 train Queer: Well, I do like the person you want to be. –Washington & Charles Loud chick: Who knows how he lucked out into marrying her? I’m just always thinking, lady, you are hot, and yet you married an Ewok. –Starbucks, 71st & Amsterdam Overheard by: Susan Volchok

“I Said Coffee!”

Cashier #1: I felt so bad. She was trying to be so nice to her, but this woman was just horrible.
Cashier #2: What happened?
Cashier #1: She asked her if she wanted a vente mocha frappacino–she was even smiling and stuff when she asked–and then the woman got all mad and said, “Look it, I don’t speak Italian.” –Starbucks, Astor Place

You Go Ahead and Feel Bad, Though

Father: They’re really promoting Paul McCartney at Starbucks.
Tween son: One of my friends said it sucks that John Lennon was shot instead of Paul McCartney. I felt bad when he said it.
Father: That’s a horrible thing to say… But your friend was right.

–Starbucks, 8th St

Wednesday One-liners Know What You Like

Girl on cell: Yeah, baby, I’m all alone in my apartment on my bed. I’m taking my panties off now. Mmm, I’m touching myself, thinking of you. I’m all wet for you, baby. –outside Starbucks, 54th & Broadway Suit on cell: Yes, I’m wearing suspenders. –Wall & Broadway Overheard by: Alexis

Just Rub the Big Toe

Girl #1: Your room always smells so good, like coconuts and coffee. It reminds me of the Caribbean. What kind of candles do you have?
Girl #2: That’s not from a candle. The coconut is from the foot cream I use so my feet don’t stink and the coffee smell is there because I spilled some on my carpet and never cleaned it up.
Girl #1: Oh…where can I get the foot cream, then? –Starbucks, 17th & Broadway