Archive for the ‘Stoners’ Category

Medicinal Wednesday One-Liners

Dude: … So she smoked some pot and said, ‘This isn’t working. I need to shoot some heroin.’

–26th St & 8th Ave

Professor: Every good professor smokes marijuana.

–John Jay College

Overheard by: soccerking3t

Fat guy: Hey, I just finished running the marathon — let’s call Jeff and go get high!

–12th St & 2nd Ave

Overheard by: off white

Young pothead: Hey, lady, could you spare some change to help support my marijuana habit?

–Borough Hall Park, Staten Island

Future teacher: I think we should let the kids smoke pot everyday after lunch… You know, just for kindergarten.

–Spruce St & Gold St

Overheard by: Kim

Chick on cell: For some reason that reminds me of The Bell Jar. But probably, I’m just still high.

–West 4th St & Greene

Your Weekly Re-Up of Wednesday One-Liners

Bike messenger screaming to another: That’s why I love you. Because you support my drug habit!

–3rd Ave & 10th St

Five-year-old with mother: I’m gonna get get get you hiiiigghh!

–10th & Broadway

Overheard by: evanescent

Mom to three-year-old daughter: Sit up! Sit up! Are you on crack?

–2 train, the Bronx

Overheard by: MK

Professor: I remember this one acid trip…

–NYU, Silver Center

Overheard by: Limey

Stoner dude: I get high to get high. I don’t expect much, but it passes time and it kills hangovers.

–17th & 8th

Overheard by: Lara

Thugette on pimped-out cell: Honey, I told yo’ ass before, I’ll tell you again: once a nigga puts rims on his Fed-Ex truck, you know he’s a drug dealer

–36th Ave station, Astoria

Overheard by: Akojam Milas

…And Smoke Them on Behalf Of the Recipients

20-something girl to much older date: So do you smoke weed?
Guy: Not so much anymore.
20-something girl: Me either… Not much… I mean, it's been a long time… But I do know this awesome guy on St. Mark's who gives me cheap pipes and has great shit. He always has something new for me.
Guy, after pause: Actually, it sounds like you smoke a lot.
20-something girl, after embarrassed pause: Well… I buy a lot of gifts.

–G Train