Archive for the ‘Stoners’ Category

Medicinal Wednesday One-Liners

Dude: … So she smoked some pot and said, ‘This isn’t working. I need to shoot some heroin.’ –26th St & 8th Ave Professor: Every good professor smokes marijuana. –John Jay College Overheard by: soccerking3t Fat guy: Hey, I just finished running the marathon — let’s call Jeff and go get high! –12th St & 2nd Ave Overheard by: off white Young pothead: Hey, lady, could you spare some change to help support my marijuana habit? –Borough Hall Park, Staten Island Future teacher: I think we should let the kids smoke pot everyday after lunch… You know, just for kindergarten. –Spruce St & Gold St Overheard by: Kim Chick on cell: For some reason that reminds me of The Bell Jar. But probably, I’m just still high. –West 4th St & Greene

Your Weekly Re-Up of Wednesday One-Liners

Bike messenger screaming to another: That’s why I love you. Because you support my drug habit! –3rd Ave & 10th St Five-year-old with mother: I’m gonna get get get you hiiiigghh! –10th & Broadway Overheard by: evanescent Mom to three-year-old daughter: Sit up! Sit up! Are you on crack? –2 train, the Bronx Overheard by: MK Professor: I remember this one acid trip… –NYU, Silver Center Overheard by: Limey Stoner dude: I get high to get high. I don’t expect much, but it passes time and it kills hangovers. –17th & 8th Overheard by: Lara Thugette on pimped-out cell: Honey, I told yo’ ass before, I’ll tell you again: once a nigga puts rims on his Fed-Ex truck, you know he’s a drug dealer –36th Ave station, Astoria Overheard by: Akojam Milas

…And Smoke Them on Behalf Of the Recipients

20-something girl to much older date: So do you smoke weed?
Guy: Not so much anymore.
20-something girl: Me either… Not much… I mean, it's been a long time… But I do know this awesome guy on St. Mark's who gives me cheap pipes and has great shit. He always has something new for me.
Guy, after pause: Actually, it sounds like you smoke a lot.
20-something girl, after embarrassed pause: Well… I buy a lot of gifts. –G Train