The Junior Family

Yuppie: “Is Freddie Prinze Jr. Harry Connick Jr.’s son?” – Streetcorner in Midtown

You know you’re Not in New York when… (Part 3)

Four teenagers in a convertible at a stop-sign speaking about me as I cross the street right in front of them, in Vancouver: “Hey, he looks Jewish!”

Business Means Never Losing Sight of Your Goals, or Your Blow

Broker #1: That dog is really cute.
Broker #2: Yeah, but we still need more coke. –St. Mark’s Place & 2nd Ave. Overheard by: Kate

Wednesday One-liners

Hottie: …and then I want to tell them: less gooch, more cooch. –DtUt, LES Overheard by: e. glass HS kid: My friend’s dad can blow smoke stars. –Columbus Circle

It Told Me to Kill My Neighbor

Man: …I’m a real East Village type of guy. I mean, I have a bird that talks. –East Village

Wednesday One-liners

Woman: I really hope that you start doing some shit that’s smart. –Broadway & Waverly Businessman: The CEO’s a good ol’ Italian goombah from Bayonne. –Midtown Office

Story of My Life

Woman: He’s such a great guy. If he were taller, I’d marry him. I admire him so much, and he’s gorgeous. –Astoria Overheard by: Todd Seavey

Then Why Am I Laughing?

Club Promoter: Do you guys like comedy shows?
Chicks: No!
Club Promoter: That wasn’t funny. –34th & 7th

Have It? I AM It!

Lady: Do you have Real Simple?
Magazine Seller: What?
Lady: Real Simple? Do you have Real Simple magazine?
Magazine Seller: What?
Lady: Real Simple! Do you have Real Simple?! –Magazine Stand, Herald Square Overheard by: Rehey

Maybe He’s Talking Physics

Suit: We’re really quite busy, actually. The lack of work hasn’t really affected the amount of work. –9th Ave. Overheard by: Brad Wilson