Yuppie: “And I thought, why are you climbing down a hole if you’re wearing a $2,500 shirt?” – Upper East Side
Archive for the ‘Stupidity’ Category
Discommunication
Woman on telephone, calling someone back after having the call was dropped: Sorry, we were discommunicated. – Times Square
That’s why everyone’s in tight clothing
Overweight woman: “I honesty think there must be a shortage of fabric or material because all shirts are baby tees and all pants are to small and low on the hips, I dont get it” – Manhattan
The language of chickens
Middle-aged Man: “you know how people all over the world, chinese, african, whatever, they look different”
Middle-aged woman: “”well no matter where you go the chickens of the world, they look the same, ever thought about that”
Middle-aged Man: “I wonder if they speak the same language?”
– McDonald’s, by the corner of Houston & Hudson
The Junior Family
Yuppie: “Is Freddie Prinze Jr. Harry Connick Jr.’s son?” – Streetcorner in Midtown
Mr. Popularity
Yuppie #1: I admire the fact that your friends are so intelligent. Most people I speak to are single cell organisms, undergoing mitosis as I speak.
Yuppie #2: Then why do you speak to them?
Yuppie #1: They’re the only ones who call me
– Bond Street Starbucks
Those are some tambourines you have
Woman upon seeing a Mariachi band walk by: Why do they have tambourines on their legs? – Manhattan
Lady In Red
Woman (wearing red pants & with red fingernails): I just made the greatest discovery: if I always dress in red, then I will always match and always look good! I’m now in the middle of getting rid of all my old clothing and buying only red clothing. – Subway
God Bless the ACLU
Cop: Come on, you’re coming with me.
Educated youth: Naw, man! I got my third right amendment! My third right amendment!
["No soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the owner, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law."]
–42nd & 7th
Paging Def Leppard
Male Employee: No, that’s hemophilia. Hypoglycemia is, like, when your
body produces more sugar than your system can handle.
Female Employee: Yeah! That’s me!
–Lord & Taylor
Overheard by: Megan Buckley