Russian Lady: Oh no, he’s too gentle to be a teacher. He went there before and the kids did whatever they wanted. They took everything from the tables. –D Train
Guy: It seems like the first couple of seasons of the Sopranos were exciting, but the last few have been boring. –D Train
Cop #1: That was a fun job. That was exciting.
Cop #2: Oh, come on.
Cop #1: When he said, “I’ll go in, you stay here”, I really thought we had a bomb there. –Bay Parkway Subway Station
Policeman: “…of course I would accept the money! Do I look like I’m rich?” – Bedford L subway station
HS Girl: That’s all she talks about. She watches Star Trek, she talks about Star Trek, she gets Star Trek tattoos all over her body.
HS Guy: At least my tattoo is cool. –4 Train Overheard by: Kaitlen
Hipster: Jesus! This place is worse than Austin seven years ago! –Bedford St. Station, Williamsburg Overheard by: K.
Woman on cell: Well what did you expect? Did you think you could just go into the subway and get a million bucks playing your guitar? –Union Square Overheard by: Domi
Crazy: So I had to get fillings in all of my teeth.
Passenger: Uh huh.
Crazy: But I figured, why let them do that to me after they drilled holes in my brain, ya know?
Crazy: But I figured, might as well! Although if they were going to fill my teeth, I’d want them to use jelly.
Crazy: But the guy at the counter said they were out of jelly. So I got a blueberry muffin.
Overheard by: Johnny Shizzle
Urban woman: Those little Chinese people never even say “Excuse me”! They’re so fucking goddamn rude! –D Train
Chick #1: What an asshole. Do I look like a transvestite?
Chick #2: No.
Chick #1: Sometimes when a woman is tall and she’s dressed like a woman, she really is a woman.
Chick #2: Unless you’re in Chelsea. –1 Train