Overheard In New York

Archive for the ‘Subway Stations’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners’ Hometowns Were Glad to See Them Go

Brit lady, to MTA booth lady: Two adults, please. We’ll be getting off around 58th Street. –14th St F station Overheard by: Fidget Tourist: Excuse me, does the F train stop here? –Subway sandwiches, Houston & Lafayette Tourist woman, loudly: Jeany? How many stops are we going on this train? –Times Square shuttle Overheard by: nevermind Tourist: Excuse me, which way is it to Upper Town? –Broadway & Worth Overheard by: dukes Tourist: Is this now the Grand Canyon of the East Coast? –Ground Zero Tourist: My plane doesn’t leave for 4 hours. Can I walk to the Statue of Liberty from here? –La Guardia Airport Overheard by: Jose Hernandez Tourist, leading a group of more than a dozen fellow tourists: Okay, I… um…don’t know where we are now…Oh, wait! Yes I do! We’re at the South Street Seaport! –Union Square Blonde: Look, there’s the Chrysler. Look, there’s Times Square. Where’s the Empire State Building? –Top of Empire State Building Overheard by: englishman in new york Tourist, to deck hand: I can’t see the Statue of Liberty. Would you please move the lifeboat out of the way while I take a picture? –Staten Island Ferry Overheard by: Steven Lowell

Plenty of Tricks Don’t Require Pants

Hobo: Do you have a dollar?
Suit: Yes.
Hobo: May I have it?
Suit: Shouldn’t you do a trick first?
Hobo: Fucker, I don’t even own pants! You want me to dance for that shit? –49th Street station Overheard by: dank

Swing and a Miss

Girl: Hey, do you have to read that for class?
Guy: Nope, just picked it up for fun.
Girl: If you like Vonnegut, you’d really like One Flew Out of the Cuckoo’s Next.
Guy: This is my stop. –4 train Overheard by: Yael

…And Mild And Sweet The Words Repeat…

Woman: No thanks, the shoes just didn’t look good on me.
Salesguy: Thanks for trying.
Woman: Uh, you’re welcome? –Steve Madden, East 86th Street Overheard by: Lucy Old man: Is this bench for young people or old people? Because I only sit with the young.
Woman: It’s for everyone.
Old man: Well, since it’s Christmastime, I’ll sit with you. –Roosevelt Island station Overheard by: Suriya

Someone Needs to Go to the Learning Annex

Man: Watch where you’re going.
Woman: Why don’t you get out of the way?
Man: Fuck you, lady.
Woman: You come from the land of yonder where animals exist! –23rd Street F station Overheard by: jill Bee