Columbia student to another: When I get rich, I'm totally having the sweat glands in my armpits removed. –Columbia University Undergrad to friend: So I should tell you about today's existential crisis… –Columbia University Overheard by: Katie Naum Guy to group of friends: Hey, you guys ever watch that video in health ed, of disabled people having sex? It was upsetting. –Columbia University Overheard by: L-Dubbs Columbia undergrad: I am taking so many classes right now, like 18 credits, cause I have no clue what to do with my life. Part of me wants to go to business school here because I can make a lot of money fast, and part of me wants to go to law school here because it's more practical and will make me more over the long run. But then I am also in this class on genocide, which is a topic I love. So maybe I will do something with that instead. –Max Cafe, 122nd & Amsterdam Ave Overheard by: reluctantprof
Young woman: Do you see this line on my face?
Friend: What line?
Young woman: This line. I must have got it from my internship. (pause) I think it's from… thinking. But I called my plastic surgeon, and he's totally gonna fix it. –Columbia University
Woman #1: So, she had half her lung removed.
Woman #2: Does she talk funny now?
Woman #1, confused: Why would she talk funny?
Woman #2: Don't you breathe through your lungs?
Woman #1: You are a moron. –34th & 7th
Lady on phone: Well, I wish I could get the fat removed from my back but we can't all get what we want, can we? –Target 10-year-old child with mother and younger siblings: I wish I could get a diaper… –K-Mart, Astor Place Random smoking kid: I really wish I could smoke out of my ass. –Lincoln Center Girl crossing the street: I really wish something would hit me…I need some money. –Times Square Overheard by: 3 day tourist Girl, after receiving gift: This is…this is so great! I'm so happy! Oh, man! I…I wish you had a little penis so I could give it a rub right now! –Barnes & Noble, Park Slope
NYU girl #1: Kate's done coke?
NYU girl #2: Yeah.
NYU girl #1: Really?
NYU girl #2: Yeah, but she hasn't done any with her new nose.
NYU girl #1: Oh. –Union Square Overheard by: Elena
Goth female store employee #1: It's not like I'm amputating a leg.
Goth female store employee #2: Not technically. –Manhattan Store
Bar guy #1: Hey, how’s it going? How’s your brother?
Bar guy #2: He had brain surgery today. –W 158th & Broadway Overheard by: puppy
Pragmatic bouncer: Well, there weren’t enough women there, so we threw in a tranny… –Broadway Caribou Coffee Overheard by: jenny Lui Man, to friend: So, he says to me "Oh, I have a sex-change operation scheduled for that day, so I can’t make it." –46th, b/w 8th & 9th Overheard by: christine 30-something woman with nose ring, on cell: She’s like a transvestite… And an ugly bird. She’s like a transvestite and an emu. [pause] It’s a really ugly bird. –7th Ave Overheard by: James from Jersey Guy: So then I was like, suck my twat! –21st & 6th 20-something girl: I had him as both a man and a woman. –17th St & 5th Ave Overheard by: Tater Dude: It’s been ages since I had testicles! –Grand Sichuan, St. Mark’s Place Overheard by: Rose Fox
Chick: Yeh, they take one of your boobs and turn it into your penis.
Gay guy: That’s sooo weird. –61st & Broadway Overheard by: Wish I heard more of this one
Queer #1: Dude, I’m so broke! I never have any money!
Queer #2: That’s because you buy coke and get your face lasered! –Vlada Overheard by: K to tha B