Spa Girl: I just want to remind you that for 24 hours after your appointment you can’t have any food or drink with color.
Man: So does that mean that I can’t sleep with a black woman tonight?
Spa Girl: Uh…no! I guess not!
–BriteSmile Spa , 57th & 5th
Overheard by: Jackie Lee
Archive for the ‘Talking/Convos’ Category
Getting Served Left and Right
Teen subway dancer: Why you opening your mouth? No one’s talking to you.
Kid subway dancer: That’s why I got a mouth. So I can talk.
Teen subway dancer: I don’t like nosey niggers.
Kid subway dancer: At least I don’t sleep outside!
–D Train
Which Means…Massive, Massive Shoes
Chick #1: I just stepped on the nicest man.
Chick #2: You stepped on him?
Chick #1: Yeah, he was really nice about it. He must have massive, massive feet.
–LES
And You Call Yourself A Guy…
Guy #1: Do you think you could ever date her?
Guy #2: I don’t know.
Guy #1: Why not?
Guy #2: I can’t picture myself having sex with her.
–Tower Records, 66th & Broadway
Overheard by: Josh Caldwell
Kids These Days, I Tell Ya…
Kid #1: Paper beats rock. BAM! Your rock is blowed up!
Kid #2: “Bam” doesn’t blow up, “bam” makes it spicy. Now I got a SPICY ROCK! You can’t defeat that!
–6 Train
You Can’t Make This Crap Up
An activist interrupts a group of yuppie chicks having a discussion.
Activist: Do you have a minute for gay rights?
Chick #1: Sorry.
Activist: Have a good day.
He leaves them to their conversation.
Chick #1: Then he’s been getting after me about how I’m selfish, and about how selfish I am.
–Union Square
Pepperoni Dreams
Three policemen are talking to a man inside Two Boots Pizza behind the security gate and locked front door, 9 am Sunday morning.
Cop: How did you get in here?
Man: I woke up here in the middle of the night!
Cop: Do you work here?
Man: No!
–Avenue A
I’m Michael Malice, and I Overheard This Message
Strand Guy: Hey, John! How are you?
John: Seven days, man. Seven days.
Strand Guy: Hopefully the world will be safe for democracy.
John: I dunno. Halliburton has some no bid contracts.
Strand Guy: You believe that?!
John: Yeah.
–Strand Basement
I’m Not Feeling So Good Myself
Tech Chick #1: Hi, how are you?
Tech Chick #2: I’m good.
Tech Chick #1: Good.
Tech Chick #2: How are you?
Tech Chick #1: I’m good.
Tech Chick #2: Good.
Tech Chick #1: How are you?
Tech Guy: Good, how are you?
Tech Chick #1: Good…*sigh*… it’s good.
–Office, Chelsea
Overheard by: Nico Westerdale
Then Why Aren’t You On A Cell?
Guy: Success is always coming between us. It’s always been that way, and will continue to be that way. –Pay phone, Cobble Hill