Teenage tourist #1: Why are American toilets so dirty?
Teenage tourist #2: Because people want to sue.
–Broome Street, Bathroom Line
Overheard by: The Messenger
Archive for the ‘Tourism’ Category
…But Know That the Whole City Of New York Is Looking Down on You.
Tourists: How do we get to the tour of ground zero?
Security guard: See that window across the street? Go up those stairs and over, and you can look down at it if you want.
–Ground Zero
Teleportation Is Fun!
Male tourist #1, pointing to Empire State Building: What building is that?
Male tourist #2: The Empire State Building.
Male tourist #1, pointing to MetLife Tower: There's Big Ben.
–23rd St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: Slufoot NYC
Why Some Relationships Don't Survive Travel.
Tourist girl: So how do you know which stop is which? Is this our stop?
Tourist boy: No, this is 50th, see? We're going to 81st.
Tourist girl: We'll be on here forever!
Tourist boy: It won't take long.
Tourist girl: So it stops at every street?
Tourist boy: What? No, it doesn't make a stop at every street. What would that…
Tourist girl, interrupting: It better not! Can I play a game?
Tourist boy: No, you can't. It's my phone. Maybe you should get one like it.
Tourist girl: Let me see it. What game is this?
Tourist boy: That's the map, remember? You said you didn't understand how to work it?
Tourist girl: Oh, yeah. Is this our stop?
Tourist boy: No, this is 59th St.
–Uptown B Train
Overheard by: Annearchist
“Live” Is a Relative Term…
Young tourist #1: What's in Queens?
Young tourist #2: I dunno. Residential?
Young tourist #1: People live there?
–6 Train
Overheard by: Eric F.
Careful– They Break Their Boy-Toys
20-something male tourist: What's the crowd like here?
20-something male New Yorker: Random cougars.
–Line at Club, Meatpacking District
Wednesday One-Liners Should Have Hired a Sherpa
Frantic woman: Excuse me, is this the train to Manhattan?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: oliver
Tourist to companion: We've left the village now, but I don't think this is Soho.
–Stanton & Orchard
Middle-aged woman in sharp looking suit: I thought Croatia was an Asian country in Europe.
–4 Train
Woman to friends: I had four kids today label New York in the middle of the Atlantic ocean. I am such a great teacher.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Mickey and Gabe
Try Asking Gandalf and Frodo
Overweight middle aged Southern tourist pointing to approaching train: Where is this train going?
Semi-annoyed girl: Queens.
Tourist: Yeah, but where is that?
Quite-a-bit-annoyed girl: Queens.
Tourist: Yeah, but where is that?
Deflated girl: It's… Never mind.
–1 Train
Overheard by: Melanie C.
Don't People Watch Sleepless in Seattle Anymore?
Street hawker: You guys going up in the Empire State Building? Need tickets?
Tourist: What is it?
–34th St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: Just wanted to go to Wendy's
…And Hopefully We'll Reach Stairs Eventually.
Tourist #1: We have to go north.
Tourist #2: Well, if north is up, then I think we should keep walking this way.
–32nd St & Broadway
Overheard by: Yousef