Fat tourist: A, I hate Spongebob. B, I’ll see you over the summer. –R train Overheard by: Laurea de Ocampo
New Yorker: There’s the Brooklyn Bridge over there. You can walk over it.
New Yorker: Yep.
Tourist: And is this City Hall?
New Yorker: Yes. I don’t know this area very well…there’s Starbucks! –City Hall Park
Young Woman: The thing I like about New York is that going out doesn’t have to involve drinking. –Williamsburg Cafe
Tourist in Vancouver: “I haven’t been able to find a post-office in Vancouver. Where are they?” Waitress: “Oh, the Canadian government sold off all the post-offices, now they just have kiosks in any pharmacy, so just go to the drug store down the street.”
Young man in Vancouver: “It’s so hard to meet anyone here who is Jewish!”
Tourist in Vancouver: Where is a neighborhood with lots of bars and cafes? Vancouverite: The street with all the bars and cafes is…. [then points and gives directions]
Australian tourist to hobo on bench: Oh, shit, where am I?
Hobo on bench: Welcome to hell, lady.
Australian tourist to hobo: No, mate, I just flew in from there yesterday.
Hopelessly lost tourist: How do you get to Broadway?
Irritable local: Practice.
Overheard by: Kelly
French tourist girlfriend, arguing with boyfriend: Do you think I'm not being serious?I can't take it anymore!
French tourist boyfriend, with constant little smile: Tu trouverais pas cela plus stylé d'aller au bord de l'eau? (“Don't you think it would be much nicer to go on the waterfront?”)
Overheard by: Tom
American tourist: Where you're from?
European tourist: Berlin.
American tourist: Ah, Berlin–that's sooo lovely!
European tourist: You been there?
American tourist: Well, almost… We've been to, like… Barcelona?
–E 42nd St