Old lady: No, Henry, trust me. You were never a fuck machine, and I certainly did know how to fake it. –113th & Broadway Overheard by: Marc Mitchell
Hipster girl #1 as priest boards train: Oh my god, it’s a priest…!
Hipster girl #2: Shit, we have to be good! We’ll go to hell! Shit! I just said, ‘Shit’! I am going to hell!
Hipster girl #1: He’s staring at us now! –Metro North train, 125th St, Harlem
Group of boys: Ewww!
Boy: Let me eat it! –LIRR Overheard by: doesn't want to know what was eaten
Thug #1: Yeah man, there’s some fucked up shit going on.
Thug #2: Word son, niggas killin’ niggas.
White guy across the car: It’s a win-win situation. –LIRR train to Penn Station from Jamaica
Woman stuck in bathroom, kicking and banging: Help me! [Inaudible yelling in Spanish.]
Conductor: Miss, don’t push the door, slide the door!
Man: Some people just shouldn’t be allowed on the train. –NJ Transit Overheard by: Erin
Thug: Daaaaaamn! Look at all them lining up for that train over to Hoboken! I'm glad we ain't got a line to go to Jersey City.
Thugette: Yeah, we the opposite of that gentry-fact-tation stuff they got goin' on over there.
(blank stares from a few suits)
Thug: Yeah! She knows what that means. –PATH Overheard by: Moving Out to Gentry-fact-tate Fort Greene
Suit on cell: I expected pus, but it’s got little black specks in it. –Pelham Bay Park, the Bronx Overheard by: HelenA.Handbasket Suit: When I said “fairy tale” I meant like Mother Goose–not Miss Dirty Martini! –F train Overheard by: braincurve Suit #1 to suit #2: Oh sure, I’ve got a source. I can get you a kidney, no problem. –Madison Square Park Female suit on cell: I don’t think you’re hearing what I’m saying. I think you’re in a very nagging place right now. –Duane & Broadway Overheard by: Rich Mintz Middle-Aged suit: Boobies boobies boobies. Boobies boobies boobies… –41st & 8th Suit on cell: So there’s gonna be total chaos on September 14th, but that’s all we have planned so far. –Church St Overheard by: Dara Suit: My goal in life is to one day sue someone. –A train Overheard by: LSB
Four-year-old #1 holding out a gummy snack: Is this a Pygmy Marmoset?
Four-year-old #2: That’s a elephant!
Four-year-old #2’s mom: It’s an elephant.
Four-year-old #1: Ugh. I wanted a Pygmy Marmoset. –Metro-North to Grand Central
Guy #1: You were not a virgin if you had sex with her.
Guy #2: Yes, I was. Technically you are still a virgin spiritually if she is ugly. –Metro North to OAR Concert Overheard by: Kelley
Fag hag: So, how was it?
Urban queer: Girl, it was a week ago and I'm still washing the taste of his dick outta my mouth! –LIRR Overheard by: Matthew