Hobo: I never should have left Kansas City. –85th between 2nd & 3rd
Woman #1: I’m ready for ugly, if it keeps me warm in bed.
Woman #2: I don’t know about that. –UES Overheard by: Todd Seavey
Dude #1: I’m gonna stand up as I turn. I’d like you to kick me in the nuts. The idea is to black out, end up in the hospital, and push this off on someone else. Ready?
Dude #2: I was born ready. –59th & Park
Chick: You know how you wanted to call him up and say it’s not personal, you just want to be friends? Don’t. They need to be told. They don’t know that they’re idiots. –Our Place, 3rd Avenue
A boss approaches his employee, holding up two pieces of lead for a retractable pencil. Boss: I don’t ask you to do much, but can you tell me which one of these is bigger? –UES Overheard by: Mindi Laine
Yuppie: “And I thought, why are you climbing down a hole if you’re wearing a $2,500 shirt?” – Upper East Side
Young Woman #1: I have to go to this “dungeon” for my Sexual Psychology class. Do you want to come?
Young Woman #2 in her mid-twenties: Is it like an S&M thing?
Young Woman #1: I don’t know. It’s like they act out different sexual
fantasies with whips and stuff.
Young Woman #2: OK, that sounds cool. – Upper East Side
Piano Player: This song from 1980 by Christopher Cross is my favorite song in the whole world. –Piano Bar, UES
Opera Fan: Well the best thing about it is, he’s the closest thing we have to a castrato today. –UES
Chick: So where in Iowa are you from? –UES