Archive for the ‘Virginity’ Category

Yet Another Drawback of Abstinence-Only Education

White guy to girl: You know both these guys are Muslim, so don’t piss them off. Muslims don’t care if they die because then they’ll get 72 virgins.
Muslim #1: It’s not 72 virgins, it’s 45 virgins.
Muslim #2: I thought it was 40 virgins.
White guy: But a Muslim person told me that it was 72 virgins.
Muslim #1: What are you gonna do with 72 virgins, man?
White guy: The same thing you’re gonna do with 45 virgins, but I would get tired of telling them what to do. –MetroTech, Lawrence St Overheard by: Jannine Ramlochan

Wednesday One-Liners Don't Count Anal

Girl on cell: I don't know what it is with me and virgins. I think I've collected like four virgin scalps. –Q58 Bus Overheard by: Tom Cashier, screaming to friend cashier: But why do you have to tell everyone that he's the guy who popped my cherry? –72nd & 1st Overheard by: tomas Ghetto girl: If you got finger-popped, you ain't no virgin. –Downtown 6 Train Overheard by: Jake M Teen boy on cell: Of course I don't have any kids! Girl, you know I'm pure–like water in Africa. –Manhattan Ave & 123rd St. Overheard by: CreativeBunny Hispanic girl, loudly to a group of friends : I mean, I'm still a virgin and I have three STDs! –Ave C

Wednesday One-Liners May Need to Pay for It

Chick on cell: What are you doing tonight? Do you want to grab a drink, since I’m not having sex? –116th & Broadway Overheard by: Ladle Hobo: You know Bin Laden? Bin Laden has no sex. –1 train Lady to two girlfriends: She harasses people with that body. That’s why ain’t nobody want her. –96th St station Mid-50s blonde: I just don’t think I’m getting anything out of this. I mean, you don’t give me sex, you don’t give me money, so what the hell am I getting? –Sushi restaurant, Soho Man on cell: I’m okay now. The doctor said I could have sex. If only I could find someone to have sex with. –E 61st & Lex Blonde: We don’t have sex that much because I’m a virgin. –E 23rd & Lex Overheard by: Jake Guy in hallway: I’d stick it in her, but she’d just pull it back out again. –Leon M. Goldstein High Overheard by: Hand-banana