Girl: What kind of fur can we use that is only shaved and doesn't hurt the animals, like shearling, and not skinned?
–Bleecker & Lafayette
Overheard by: Anonymous
Man to ladies: So, I walk in the room and I see one guy shaving the other guy's balls.
–Forest Hills, Queens
Overheard by: CandyPerfume
Guy to girl: I just shaved my balls and now I'm itching all over.
–Houston St
Overheard by: pubey-free
Archive for the ‘Waxing’ Category
How You Know a Guy's Gay: An OINY Parable
Woman: But I can't make it, because I have a laser hair-removal appointment at one o'clock.
Man: Uh, where are you getting the hair removed?
Woman: My legs, parts of my crotch, and my armpits.
Man: Aweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesome!
–Washington Square
Wednesday One-Liners Cunt Hardly Wait
Random girl: I think PETA should be informed any time an animal is fully submerged in a vagina.
–Webster Hall
Overheard by: Jen
20-something platinum blonde to another: Her vagina… Her vagina must be the size of, like, the Grand Canyon.
–7th Ave & 12th St
Girl, about her play: I don't think people are going to laugh about the vagina being killed on stage… Yeah, no one's gonna laugh when the vagina dies.
–NYU
Dude questioning another: What do mean by "moderate Taliban"? Like the women can wax their vaginas?
–Elizabeth Street
Young man shouting on cell: Then just tell her you don't like her vagina!
–26th St & Park Ave
Silky-Smooth and Lightly Scented Wednesday One-Liners
Guido to another: She actually shaves between sex and shit.
–Bay Ridge, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Belladonna Wexhome
Middle-aged Guido: Nobody gives tricks any more, only treats. I remember when I was a kid. I used to get shaving cream in my face.
–78th St & West End
Overheard by: jess_stang
Guy coming out of Beeswax screening: I will not bow to the hegemony of the razor.
–BAM Cinemafest
Girl to friend and boyfriend: I definitely prefer a female gynecologist to a male one. Mine is a really old woman, and she's great! She just says to me, "I am shaving you." My lips are really big!
–E 7th St
Overheard by: Evan
Have You Seen Wednesday? It's Totally Had Its One-Liners Done.
Woman on cell: I can't believe no one said anything… How could no one notice? It used to be sooooo crooked, and I spend all this money to get my nose fixed, and no one says anything?
–Norfolk & Houston
50-year-old lady: So are you still down for the Brazilian wax?
–45th & Broadway
Overheard by: Chuch
Little girl, pointing at someone having their eyebrows threaded: Look! They're sewing that woman's face!
–14th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: kenzi
Orange lady: Is it like you definitely, for sure get cancer from a tanning bed? Cause then I might stop.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Alexis
Eighties: Ever Miss Me?
Girlfriend: Baby, why don't you just use an electric?
Boyfriend: Who the hell uses an electric razor on their balls, unless they want them fried?
–NYU
Overheard by: Mark
Presenting the Year's Sweetest Compliment
Girl: Do you like it better when I'm shaved?
Guy: Eh… I don't really care.
Girl: Really? Most guys have a preference.
Guy: Yeah, but with you it doesn't matter. You know how any hairstyle looks good on a pretty face? It's kind of like that.
–Bowery & 5th St
Overheard by: didn't see her face…
But at Least You Didn't Accidentally Drink the Nair This Time
Middle-aged blonde woman: We had a bottle of Nair and beer bottles in the shower. Woke up hungover, with no hair, in my underwear.
Middle-aged brunette woman: That's just sad.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Markle
…Hint, Hint.
Duane Reade employee, pointing to back of store: You can't go in there, the floor's just been waxed.
Swaying drunk girl: So has my vagina, that doesn't mean people aren't allowed in there!
–Duane Reade
Vanity, Thy Name Is Wednesday One-Liners
Girl to guy: And I was like, "He bleaches his asshole, what does he know about anatomy?"
–Pratt Institute, Brooklyn
Seven-year-old girl to boy throwing mud at her: Watch it, Jakob! I wore eyeliner today!
–Fort Greene Park, Brooklyn
Very large woman on cell: It's called "Brazilian wax job." You only have to do it like every two weeks. Yep, it itches for a day or two, but it's worth every penny.
–PATH
Overheard by: Corey
Young lady with long curly hair to girlfriend: So, I started drying my hair with paper towels recently.
–Montague St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: E-Man>Master of the UNIVERSE!
Outraged feminine gay guy to another: He's having his lips redone… again!
–8th Ave & 20th St, Chelsea
Overheard by: Evan
Woman on cell: Girl, I don't understand why you gotta put on all that makeup just to go for a colonic!
–Washington Heights