Hipster chick: Ugh, dolls. Dolls are so creepy. I’m never letting my kid have a doll. Drugs, yes. Dolls, no. –UES
Three policemen are talking to a man inside Two Boots Pizza behind the security gate and locked front door, 9 am Sunday morning.
Cop: How did you get in here?
Man: I woke up here in the middle of the night!
Cop: Do you work here?
Man: No! –Avenue A
Guy: Of course I’ve drank kerosene. But it wasn’t like I used a cup, though. I used a siphon. –Astoria Overheard by: Stephie Russell
Guy, on Nextel: Hey, honey.
Girl, on other end of Nextel: Dad, I'm pissed! I think he's cheating on me.
Guy: Why do you say that?
Girl: Cause my vagina is itchy and red.
Guy: Well, maybe you should go get checked.
Girl: But dad, what should I do?
Guy: Honey, let me call you back, I'm about to pay the cashier… call you in a little.
–33rd & Madison
Overheard by: OZoNE
Hobo walking around making gun with hands: Spiderman, Spiderman, Spiderman…
Bag lady, to no one in particular: He thinks he's s Spiderman, but he's really not.
Hobo to hand: She's right, ya know. Spiderman.
Tall, loud girl to friend: I don't know, I think he really just wants to settle down, you know?
Hobo sitting nearby: Hey! I wanna settle down!
–Broadway & 78th St
Overheard by: Mary
Girl #1: But I secretly like when guys check me out.
Girl #2: What about Steven*?
Girl #1: Oh yeah… He's like a lesbian, who knows.
Cute, slightly obnoxious girl: I didn't get sexually harassed today!
Huge Latino male friend: High five!
(five or six people from surrounding tables walk over to get in on the high fives)
–Esperanto Cafe, 3rd & MacDougal
Woman #1: Wow, those fingerless gloves are great! You look like you could get into a fistfight, but in a totally adorable way!
Woman #2: It would be the cutest, fuzziest, bluest fight ever!
–5th & 22nd
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Mom to children: You guys look like dancers!
Little girl #1: Yeah!
Little girl #2: Yeah! Like flash dancers!
Mom: What are flash dancers?
Little girl #1: They take of their clothes and flash people!
Little girl #2: Yeah!
–Whole Foods, Bowery
Overheard by: Bruce Lee