Archive for the ‘West Village’ Category

Boys Don't Wednesday One-Liner

Mom to small children: Well, we all have parts. And these parts talk to our bodies and tell us we are a boy or a girl. And sometimes these parts get confused.

–Washington Square East

20-something girl to male friend: You're a dirty girl! You're a dirty girl! You're a dirty girl!

–N Train

Overheard by: TR

Mother to gender-transitioning son, questioning plans for surgery: Are you a boy trapped in a girl's body? I'm getting a face lift, and it's because I'm a young person trapped in an old person's body.

–39th & 9th

Man in yellow and green track suit and aviator sunglasses: Nah, I can't go. That's when I'm having my breast reduction.

–Columbus Circle

Overheard by: Ems

Teenage boy: I don't wanna be on that block, son! I know too many trannies on that block!

–Bedford & Grove

Overheard by: How many is too many?

Guy on cell, leaving message: Hello, Dave. This is your mother.

–Tisch School of the Arts

Overheard by: Bruce Lee

Teen boy: Fear me, I have vaginitis!

–Staten Island Ferry

Overheard by: Jingles

We Heart Wednesday One-Liners, Now More Than Ever

Guy to friend: Oowee! Some weed and a perm! That's my perfect New York day.

–West Village

Overheard by: Joe

Conductor: Step in, stand clear…let's go New York!

–1 Train

Overheard by: Ashley Nelson

Intoxicated creepster: Are we in Manhattan? What the hell! This city is so full of New Yorkers!

–St. Mark's Place

Overheard by: Lizzzzz

Bitter man on subway: I think one summer here would cure them of any love they have for this town.

–1 Train

Passerby to surprised-looking wife, watching fight: They're fighting. It's New York, that's what people do in this city.

–City Hall

Overheard by: ascorbique & almost famous

Grinning paramedic to female tourist in shock, strapping her to backboard after she was struck by a car: Welcome to New York!

–34th St & 7th Ave

Overheard by: Mateo que Feo

Wednesdanimal One-Liners

Man to friend: I don't know what made him think he could outrun an alligator!

–Sheridan Square

Overheard by: Lory

Father to young son: Holy shit, Joey, look at the turtles! They're stackin' and rackin' 'em!

–Central Park Zoo

Mom to kid, pointing to seal exhibit: Look! Otters!

–Central Park Zoo

Overheard by: Rebecca

Young man, joyfully throwing his arms in the air: Then all of the lemmings go off of the cliff!

–The Village

Overheard by: Aaron

Wednesday One-Liners Lead with Their Nipples

12-year-old girl to friend: So, he asked me for a piggyback ride and grabbed onto my boobs! Isn’t that what you call sexism? When you’re a perv? Sexist?

–6th & Houston

Overheard by: Ha, ha, Mal.

Man on cell: You’re an eight, but you’d be a ten if your boobs were bigger…

–19th & 7th

Girl: Where’s my phone? … Oh, there’s my boob.

–Prospect Heights, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Mariah

Woman on cell: I have to throw my breasts around and tell every guy I want to have sex with them at work.

–68th & 2nd

Chick on cell: I haven’t yet met him, you know, but he has a Christmas card featuring my boobies on his fridge.

–LIRR

Overheard by: Ladle

Wednesday One-Liners for Black History Month

Russian woman to Russian friend: I want to see Notorious because it's about black people.

–Regal Cinema, 13th & Broadway

High school boy: Hey, look–a black kid!

–B1 Bus

Overheard by: Robert Gleyberman

Black guy: Don't worry, its alright! I'm not that black! I haven't mugged anybody in two weeks, and I love all white people under six feet tall!

–Time Square

Overheard by: Jennie

Middle-aged black woman, to no one in particular: That George W. Bush! He walks like an arrogant black man!

–Queens

Overheard by: BigFatTiger

Nerdy Jewish guy: I don't know what went wrong. I should be a black girl by now!

–Queens College