Archive for the ‘West Village’ Category

We Heart Wednesday One-Liners, Now More Than Ever

Guy to friend: Oowee! Some weed and a perm! That's my perfect New York day. –West Village Overheard by: Joe Conductor: Step in, stand clear…let's go New York! –1 Train Overheard by: Ashley Nelson Intoxicated creepster: Are we in Manhattan? What the hell! This city is so full of New Yorkers! –St. Mark's Place Overheard by: Lizzzzz Bitter man on subway: I think one summer here would cure them of any love they have for this town. –1 Train Passerby to surprised-looking wife, watching fight: They're fighting. It's New York, that's what people do in this city. –City Hall Overheard by: ascorbique & almost famous Grinning paramedic to female tourist in shock, strapping her to backboard after she was struck by a car: Welcome to New York! –34th St & 7th Ave Overheard by: Mateo que Feo

Wednesdanimal One-Liners

Man to friend: I don't know what made him think he could outrun an alligator! –Sheridan Square Overheard by: Lory Father to young son: Holy shit, Joey, look at the turtles! They're stackin' and rackin' 'em! –Central Park Zoo Mom to kid, pointing to seal exhibit: Look! Otters! –Central Park Zoo Overheard by: Rebecca Young man, joyfully throwing his arms in the air: Then all of the lemmings go off of the cliff! –The Village Overheard by: Aaron

Wednesday One-Liners Lead with Their Nipples

12-year-old girl to friend: So, he asked me for a piggyback ride and grabbed onto my boobs! Isn’t that what you call sexism? When you’re a perv? Sexist? –6th & Houston Overheard by: Ha, ha, Mal. Man on cell: You’re an eight, but you’d be a ten if your boobs were bigger… –19th & 7th Girl: Where’s my phone? … Oh, there’s my boob. –Prospect Heights, Brooklyn Overheard by: Mariah Woman on cell: I have to throw my breasts around and tell every guy I want to have sex with them at work. –68th & 2nd Chick on cell: I haven’t yet met him, you know, but he has a Christmas card featuring my boobies on his fridge. –LIRR Overheard by: Ladle

Wednesday One-Liners for Black History Month

Russian woman to Russian friend: I want to see Notorious because it's about black people. –Regal Cinema, 13th & Broadway High school boy: Hey, look–a black kid! –B1 Bus Overheard by: Robert Gleyberman Black guy: Don't worry, its alright! I'm not that black! I haven't mugged anybody in two weeks, and I love all white people under six feet tall! –Time Square Overheard by: Jennie Middle-aged black woman, to no one in particular: That George W. Bush! He walks like an arrogant black man! –Queens Overheard by: BigFatTiger Nerdy Jewish guy: I don't know what went wrong. I should be a black girl by now! –Queens College

It's Wednesday One-Liners, Paleface!

Guy to friend: When Obama wins, I'm going to slap a white person. –Central Park Bench Overheard by: Lane Lady getting sprayed with perfume by her friend: Stop. Stop it! You gonna make me smell like white people. –East Drive, Prospect Park Overheard by: White smelly jogger Black gay man sans shirt, upon seeing group of white girls wandering: Oh my god, white girls! Oh, I didn't mean it like that. –Christopher St Gentleman walking past Miss Mamie's Spoonbread Too restaurant: Man, black people eating tofu, white people eating spoonbread… –W 110th & Columbus Gingy, referring to ebony colored condoms: This way, when I fuck a white boy he'll still be black! –E Broadway 99 Cent Store Black lady in african garb: Too many white flower! Need more black power! (the only white girl around looks up confusedly, now black lady screams in her face) White flower! –125th & Adam Clayton Powell Overheard by: Ruby