Archive for the ‘Words’ Category

If That’s the Worst You’ve Heard, You’re Not Listening

God girl #1: … And then Todd* called Jake* a scumbag! Can you believe he said that?!
God girl #2: No, he didn’t call him that. He called him something else, but the same…
God girl #1: Oh… Douchebag! He called him a douchebag!
God girl #2: Yeah, I didn’t know what that meant. No one uses that word.
God girl #1: I heard it three years ago, and that’s only because I moved to the city.

–1 train

You Mean Like Bacon?

Boyfriend: So, my buddy’s celebrating Rosh Hashanah tomorrow, and he said he’ll bring me some matzah ball soup.
Girlfriend: He’s celebrating what? And giving you what?
Boyfriend: Some Jewish holiday. Some Jewish food.
Girlfriend: Ah.

–2 train

Overheard by: