Wannabe Player: It is a pleasure to have the honor of being in your company. –Halloween Party, Greenwich Village
Hispter eating in Bonita in Williamsburg: “…and they have their own vocabulary, using phrases like, ‘hanging out.’”
In a coffeeshop in Los Angeles (the Novel cafe in Santa Monica), a tutor is giving a beginning Spanish lesson to a student at the table next to me. The student is reading a newspaper article in Spanish, and then translating each sentence word by word:
Student: “I don’t know what this word, ‘decada’ means”
Teacher: “What do you think it means?”
Student: “I don’t know”
Student: “I really don’t know”
Teacher: “Here’s a hint. It’s very similar to an English word”
Student: “‘Decada’? Deca….. I have no idea”
Teacher: “It’s almost identical to the English word”
Teacher: “There’s only one letter difference”
Teacher: “C’mon, what do you think?”
Student: “I really have no idea”
(Teacher pinches her on the nose!)
Teacher: “It’s Decade!!!”
Student: “Ahhhhh!!!! Okay! I feel stupid!”
Woman in McDonald’s: “…and they were conversating about…”
Old Woman #1: …I like that too. You know what’s good? I like to eat that pissghetti.
Old Woman #2: Yeah, that stuff is good.
Old Woman #1: But they should give it a better name. –Bronx Supreme Court building Overheard by: The Evil Sneeze
Guy #1: I got a cough.
Guy #2: You got a cough?
Guy #1: Yeah, I got one.
Guy #2: I wonder if it’s the same one I got.
Guy #1: It’s a cough. –LES Overheard by: David Bowman
High School Girl: Yeah, he’s like older, and really successful and stuff.
High School Guy: Is he critical?
High School Girl: Yeah. Totally critical. –6 Train
Old Friend #1: I can’t believe how long it’s been!
Old Friend #2: Me either. What do you do now?
Old Friend #1: Workin’ down at the docks.
Old Friend #2: You ever see old so-and-so?
Old Friend #1: Yeah, I used to see him all the time once in a while. –F Train
Fax Guy: I never made that bet with you. We didn’t shake on it.
Fax Girl: You can’t do that. We had a bet. You believe this shit? He’s trying to renig on the bet.
Tech Guy: Um, isn’t the term renege? Like, short for renegotiate.
Tech Girl: Not with this nigger it’s not. –Downtown Office
Woman: Does anyone have something I could write with?
Mother: I do! One second.
Woman: Great, thanks.
Mother: Be careful, it’s my most favoritest pen. –LaGuardia Overheard by: Jess Kimball