Wannabe Player: It is a pleasure to have the honor of being in your company. –Halloween Party, Greenwich Village
Him: You know what I’m saying, because I was all “you know what I’m saying”, you know what I’m saying?
Her: I have no idea what you’re trying to say. –Sea Thai Bistro, Williamsburg Overheard by: Greg Rutter
Girl, 18, #1: …so Mikey and I were in the car and Annie came and opened the door and was like “Oops!” Cause we went to Germany.
Girl, 18, #2: Germany?
Girl, 18, #1: You know, “Jerk me” is like “Germany”. So we say we’re “going to Germany”. –D train
Tall, loud girl to friend: I don't know, I think he really just wants to settle down, you know?
Hobo sitting nearby: Hey! I wanna settle down!
–Broadway & 78th St
Overheard by: Mary
Woman #1: Wow, those fingerless gloves are great! You look like you could get into a fistfight, but in a totally adorable way!
Woman #2: It would be the cutest, fuzziest, bluest fight ever!
–5th & 22nd
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Six-year old girl: Mom! I want some triffles!
(tired mother ignores her)
Six-year old girl: Triffles, mom! Can I have some when we get home? Please, mom? I want triffles! Triffles, triffles, triffles!
Tired mother: What the hell is a triffle? I don't even know what those are.
Six-year old girl: Yeah. Me neither.
Overheard by: Now I really wanna know
Pimp to player across the street: Yo! Stay over there, this side's for pimps and that side's for players. I'm a pimp. Lemme show you that pimp walk! (starts walking down the street, gets to player) How you like that, playa? That's how we do it, pimp style.
–115th & 7th, Harlem
Overheard by: beeloo
Female college student: Valentine's Day? Girl, pimps don't do Valentine's.
Girl on cell: I feel like a pimp, I say hi to everybody.
–86th & 4th, Brooklyn
Elderly man to even more elderly man: I'm gonna pimp-slap you right down on the street!
Midwestern tourist woman walking into trashy store: I hope this isn't a porn shop!
Overheard by: Jingles
30-something woman on cell: I'm not bringing the baby to the porn convention!
Man on phone: Did you say "corn" or "porn"?
–Onion News Network
Overheard by: Kaze
Man to wife: Don't worry, I don't need to upgrade. That's what porn is for!
–40th & Broadway
Overheard by: mel
Pretty girl at hamburger exhibition: Wait, it's got pork in it? Do you even eat pork?
(pause) I mean… Not because you're Jewish, I just thought you didn't eat pork for some reason.
Tall male friend: I eat pork.
–Laundromat Gallery, Bushwick
Female lawyer #1: So we stopped and ate at Cracker Barrel.
Female lawyer #2: Oh, my husband loves Cracker Barrel!
Male lawyer #1: How come it's okay to have a restaurant named Cracker Barrel, but when there was a restaurant chain called Sambo's, they were forced to change their name?
Male lawyer #2: And what about the Washington Redskins?
Male lawyer #1: Yeah, imagine if they had a team named The Darkies?
Male lawyer #2: So how come nobody forces the Redskins to change their name?
Male lawyer #1: Cause, when's the last time you saw a mob of Indians kick someone's ass?
Male lawyer #2: Custer?
Male lawyer #1: I rest my case.
Female lawyer #2: And just what does any of this have to do with Cracker Barrel?
Male lawyer #1: You ever take a look at who eats there?
–Civil Court, Sutphin Boulevard, Jamaica
Overheard by: Big Larry