Archive for the ‘Yankee Stadium’ Category

Nothing Makes Me Come Like Some Zyklon, Redux

Queer: Why do you like him? The guy behind us in the black shirt is so much hotter.
Hag: Ew…
Queer: You know I like those big, rough German types…if he put me in a camp, just imagine all the terrible things he would do to me.
Hag: …Would you stop staring at him?
Queer: I so want him to rape me.
Hag: Get over it, he’s not gay!
Queer: Whatever, if we were in prison he’d so be doing me. –Yankee Stadium Overheard by: Smack Jack Guy: This is going to sound awful but Ryan Gosling was really hot in that movie where he played the Nazi with the shaved head.
Girl: Yeah, he was a hot Nazi in that movie. A hotzi, if you will. –92nd Street Y Overheard by: Kelly

Wednesday One-Liners: Great for Bachelor Parties!

16-year-old girl on cell: So like, for Halloween my mom told me about this strip club we could go to… –110th & Central Park West Overheard by: sophie Balis-Harris Drunk stumbling Yankee meathead to fellow meatheads: Yo! Let's get some fucking strippers! I don't give a fuck about my girlfriend! (pauses and looks around) If I drop any more beer on this woman… (spills half his cup on her back) Ah, fuck. –Yankee Stadium Overheard by: seat 12 section 23 20-something woman on cell: What, you had sex with that stripper?! –Union Square Overheard by: Liz Drunk suit: Yeah…we did it up fo' my son's 18th birfday. He be graduatin and all this year, so we sprung fo' a stripper. –Q67 Bus Overheard by: Kate Teen screaming into cell: Stripper. (pause) No, stripper! –Little Italy

Ever Since It Didn’t Happen Yet, Things Just Haven’t Been the Same

College kid: They should put up a question on the big screen that says, ‘Who fucked up the playoffs two years in a row for us: A) Number 13, ARod, C) Alex Rodriguez, or D) All of the above?
Friend: … Or maybe Kevin Brown.
Man in front of them: The future ain’t what it used to be… –Yankee Stadium