Archive for the ‘Yuppies’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Want You to Know About the Size of Their Bank Accounts

Yuppie on cell (trying to be discreet): Hey mom. Are you busy? Could you Google Maps me? I'm on Houston and West Broadway. Yeah, I didn't want to ask anyone for directions and make a fool of myself. Although I'm pretty sure I just did, because half of this coffee shop is looking at me now. –W Houston Overheard by: Let's face it, we were all new at one point. 40-something yuppie woman: And then I realized that my biggest problem in life is that most of the time I'm incredibly happy, but I'm not aware of how happy I am. –81st & Madison Yuppie dad to seven-year-old daughter: Now when you start buying iPods, that's when you're going to want to have a Visa card. –Stanton & Christie Overheard by: Ross Three-year-old yuppie spawn: Noooooooooooo! I don't want Pad Thai! I want sushi! –Dice Thai, Prospect Park Overheard by: I'll take sushi too but you're payin', kid

Why the V-Chip Doesn’t Help

Yuppie mom: Look, honey, that girl holds her daddy’s hand when they cross the street.
Little girl: What a slut!
Yuppie mom: What?! Where did you learn that phrase?!
Little girl: Daddy, Daddy, Daddy! –8th & 2nd Overheard by: What a Skank

Wednesday One-Liners for Young, Urban Professionals

Female yuppie: As a general rule of thumb, I think I should refrain from going to the Hustler Club with my male boss and co-workers from now on. –Downtown C train Overheard by: amused passenger Yuppie: It was the most intense Hava Nagilah I’d ever seen. –43rd & Lex Yuppie, examining the New York Public Library: Wow, that library is such a waste of real estate! –42nd & 5th Avenue Overheard by: Reader Rabbit Emo Girl to friend: Oh I love Whole Foods, its like Wal-Mart for Yuppies. –Whole Foods, Union Square Overheard by: Addie Wagenknecht Yuppie, to McDonald’s cashier: Do you have French vanilla capuccino? –McDonald’s, 34th & 10th

Young Urban Professional Wednesday One-Liners

Yuppie screenwriter girl: So I was a very precocious child. Or whatever, y'know. And I just wanted to explore that dynamic a little bit? Basically it's a buddy picture between the little me and the big me. –14th & 8th Yuppie woman: And what do I say to that? "I have a smack habit, give me money"! –St. Mark's Place Yuppie man: If I hear "breast milk cupcakes" one more time… –Outside Gotham Bar and Grill Yuppie, thoughtfully: It's not the mustard, it's what the mustard represents! –Food Emporium, 2nd Ave

This Is Not a Hard Problem

50-something yuppie guy to another: My wife just doesn't understand that men go through menopause too. It's not just a woman's problem. These past few months I can tell that I've begun my menopause.
Teenage girl sitting across from two yuppies: I'm pretty sure they call what you're going through “erectile dysfunction.” –F Train Overheard by: Sophia