Archive for the ‘Yuppies’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Haven’t Met Most Of Their Friends

Yuppie: I don’t google enough. –F Train, 7th Ave Overheard by: imaginexrach Girl on cell: Not being on Facebook is ruining my life! –NYU Bus Overheard by: Asian Kid Assistant on phone, about her 17-year-old daughter’s MySpace page: I find it interesting that she and her friend Shannon have the same friend listed. Some 32-year-old guy in California named Tom! –Office on 42nd & Madison Overheard by: herspace Man: I’m going to go home and e-mail some shameless bitches. –8th St & Broadway Grad student at computer, dolefully: Without right-click I just don’t know what to do with the world. –Columbia University Overheard by: Ladle

Many of Us Are Even at Jim’s Level

Yuppie mom #1: Can you believe that there are people living in this city who make under two hundred thousand dollars?
Yuppie mom #2: Really?
Yuppie mom #1: Yes, I’d never do that. I wouldn’t want to live like a Huckleberry Finn. The conversation then got too low for me to hear after they saw I was eavesdropping and giving them the evil eye. –Riverside Park

We’re Considering Branding Wednesday One-liners

Woman: This is my favorite part…of the worst song ever. –MTV Studios, Times Square Man on cell: No, it is not like the time I farted at Target and blamed in on that old woman! –22nd & Park Overheard by: Bill Ray Drunken yuppie guy: I want my Subway sandwich! I want my Subway sandwich! Tuna and onions! Yeah, you heard me. Girls love big cocks. Girls love big cocks! These girls know. I’m on…I’m on Comedy Central! I’m a redneck on Comedy Central! My name is Heywood Jablowme! Heywood Jablowme! Heywood Jablowme! I’m from Texas where girls suck cock for a dime! –32nd & 2nd Woman: Did you hear Cooter wouldn’t endorse that remake? –7 train Overheard by: Todd Horan Guy: God, I feel like I’m trapped in a fucking Hallmark Card. –Central Park Overheard by: Shoshana Latina: …and he looks evil and the Princess is saying to him, “You are a good person” and he looks so evil and then she is with Obi King Wasabi and he said he is on the dark side and then the shorty guy–what is his name?–Yoga said, “He is on the dark side” and then Dark Wader he is with the cape and looks all angry and evil reminded me of me on Mondays. –58th & Lexington Overheard by: Brandy Rowell

I Hope No Men Find Out How Foul Women Can Be

Female yuppie #1: … And it was smeared all over the walls of the stall!
Female yuppie #2: Oh my god, that is so disgusting.
Female yuppie #1: Yeah, I can’t believe someone would do that at work.
Female yuppie #2: I can’t believe someone would do that ever! –South-bound G train Overheard by: Kevin

It’s Like Jersey Got Rich and Took a Bath

Suit: It’s up in Connecticut, right over the river in Norwalk, I think.
Lady suit: Oh, I don’t that Connecticut, I only know Danbury.
Suit: Isn’t that in Connecticut?
Lady suit: I told you, I don’t know Connecticut. –Maiden Lane & South Street Yuppie guy: I don’t know, man. I’m still on Connecticut time. –W. 56th between 5th & 6th