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Speaking of Cheesy Things?
JAP #1: Oh my god, is that how you spell 'quiche'? I always thought it was spelled K-E-E-S-H. That is a really weird spelling.
JAP #2: Yeah, that is a totally weird spelling.
JAP #1: And I'm usually such a good speller!
JAP #2: Yeah, you are totally such a good speller! ... Have you ever seen Sixteen Candles?
--Whole Foods, Union Square
Overheard by: unhipster
Just Like Some Rectangles Are Squares, and Some NYC Women Have Frontal Lobe Damage
Man: That place isn't Chinese, it's Japanese.
Woman: Yeah, but some Chinese are Japanese.
--42nd & Madison
Overheard by: Matthew K Johnson
Wednesday One-Liners Built the Tower of Babel
Guy: Hey! Where's my Sudanese pussy from Chinatown?
--14th & University
Guy on cell: I'll meet you at the corner by the store with Chinese writing...Hey, wait a minute. All the fucking signs around here have Chinese writing.
--Walker & Lafayette
Overheard by: Wolf
Guy on cell: So, if this is true, then Dracula's native language would be Hungarian rather than Romanian. And I think that is important for my research.
--Anthology Film Archives, 2nd St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: nosy cinephile
Teen girl: This bag is mad Aztec.
--13th & University
Co-Worker: So, did she mention anything about Mexicans?
--Office, W 36th St
Overheard by: Evan
Well-Traveled girl: Mexico is not a Third-World country. JFK is.
--Tea Lounge, Park Slope
Small child: Mommy, look! You can tell he's Mexican by his eyes!
--Bodies exhibit, South Street Seaport
White girl, to Asian girl: So wait, is he just not Japanese or not interested?
--Walgreens, Union Square
Overheard by: Goldie
Businesswoman: Well you can't kill a Vietnamese man because that would just cost too much.
--I Trulli restaurant, E 27th St
Hobo: You're not Polish; you just think you're Polish!
--Tompkins Square Park
Voice over intercom: Will the foreign exchange student please come to the cashier.
--Century 21
Sassy chick: I can't believe she's moving to fucking Cambodia to live with a fucking cricket-hunter she's only known for two months!
--TGI Friday's, 52nd & 7th
Overheard by: Shaina
Dead or Alive's Subliminal Messages Finally Kick In
American guy #1: Remember when you were here last year, and Mike was spinning you around, and dropped you on your head?
Japanese girl: What?
American guy #2: Last year! In New York! You were here! I took your legs and went like this! I dropped you on your head!
Japanese girl: Yes! Yes! Ha, ha, ha, ha!
American guy #1: Dude, she loves it! Most girls, if you dropped them on their heads, would be like, "Fuck you, I'm never talking to you again."
--C train
No, Because Ricin Clears People Out Like You Wouldn't Believe
Black girl: Oh my God, this train is crowded.
Japanese guy: In Tokyo, the trains are much more crowded than this!
Black girl: Why? 'cause they can fit so many more of you little guys on it?
--6 train
Overheard by: Carri
Notes from the New York Underground
The subway doors open. A hobo enters, holding a bottle of windex in one hand and a tube of toothpaste in the other.
Hobo: Which is the better time to read Dostyevsky? Winter?
He sprays the windex.
Hobo: Or Spring?
He squeezes toothpaste out of the tube.
Japanese girl: Spring!
Hobo: You are correct.
--F train
Overheard by: Pete Johnson
I Have a Feeling the Best Part Came Next...
Fat black woman: Hey, watch where you're going! Say "excuse me" instead of bumping into me like that. Don't you know how to speak English?
Japanese girl: You need a diet!
--Penn station
Overheard by: JL
Some NYC History, Overheard Style
Slacker #1: You know that ships used to come up the river and dock in the West Village?
Slacker #2: Really, man?
Slacker #1: Yeah, really. They used to let the sailors out there...yeah, that's where the term "Hey Sailor" came from.
--Prince Street laundromat
Japanese girl: If this is New York, where are Old York?
Japanese Dad: I think that is in England.
--59th & 6th
Overheard by: Svein Brunstad
