<b><a href="http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/003661.html">Wednesday One-liners Watch Too Much TV</a></b><br/> Dude: Are you suggesting MacGyver is my penis? --F train Overheard by: Giovanni Diaz <p> Southern lady: Oh my goodness! There was a girl. And she was a <em>big</em> girl. And she was wearing a short, short tiny little skirt. And she had a <em>thong</em> on! With <em>no pants</em>! And a boy came up and started bonin' her from behind! I thought I was in <em>The Twilight Zone</em>! --N train Guy: Well, I'd let Jessica Alba give me head, but she'd have to be wearing gold hoop earrings and chew gum. You know, totally porno. --5th Avenue & 10th Street Overheard by: Christina Walker Guy on cell: I gonna watch that with a fucking can of Vaseline, playing with myself the whole time. --50th & 8th Dude: You think Bill Gates gives a shit about a bunch of jackoff losers playing Madden 2006? He probably installed some censors in the controls that reprogram your brain with the same code they wrote XP in as you play. --Millennium Broadway Hotel, West 44th Street Overheard by: Jonathan Dorman Tourist dad: Who did you think was going to be staying at our hotel? Madonna? Brad Pitt? Erik Estrada? --8th between 47th & 48th<br/>via <a href="http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/">Overheard in New York</a>, Nov 30, 2005