<b><a href="http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/011838.html">Wednesday One-Liners Hope They Get a Pony This Year</a></b><br/> <!-- ID = 65239 -->Concert-goer to friend: ... And then she told me, 'I had a shitty birthday, but what do you expect? I'm dating a pirate!' And I said, 'He's not a pirate, he's a douchebag! You're dating a douchebag!'<br/><br/>--Beacon Theatre, 75th &amp; Broadway<br/><br/><!-- ID = 67577 -->Woman to friend: I don't know what to get him for his birthday. Do you know what he gave me for my birthday? An ulcer.<br/><br/>--A train, between 59th &amp; 42nd<br/><br/><!-- ID = 68927 -->Chick: He gave me a laptop for my birthday... And we haven't even had sex yet!<br/><br/>--Sol y Sombra<br/><br/><!-- ID = 69958 -->Yuppie on cell: I think because of the mental state I was in that really doesn't count as cheating. Plus, it was my birthday, so technically it never happened, therefore I didn't fuck up or do anything wrong, therefore nothing ever happened to begin with, therefore you have no reason to complain, therefore you are still my girlfriend.<br/><br/>--14th St &amp; E 1st Ave<br/><br/>Overheard by: Adrienne<br/><br/><br/>via <a href="http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/">Overheard in New York</a>, Sep 26, 2007