<b><a href="http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/018075.html">Wednesday One-Liners Get Railroaded</a></b><br/> <!-- ID = 110138 -->Conductor: Check around, make sure you have all of your belongings. If you have small children, make sure you hold onto them. (in haunting tone) Wouldn&#39;t want to see them disappear...into the gap.<br/><br/>--Metro-North Line<br/><br/>Overheard by: Jess<br/><br/><!-- ID = 110283 -->Train conductor on PA: The last car is the quiet car. No cell phones or loud conversations please. If you need to have a conversation, please do so silently.<br/><br/>--Penn Station<br/><br/><!-- ID = 111709 -->Conductress, in monotone: The next stop on this train will be Grand Street, the last stop in the borough...in the borough....in the borough of Manhattan.<br/><br/>--D Train<br/><br/>Overheard by: Jon A.<br/><br/><!-- ID = 112413 -->Conductor on PA: The next stop will be 51st Street. All of you lookin&#39; for the local train on the other platform: hey yo! We over here!<br/><br/>--14th Street Station<br/><br/><!-- ID = 112595 -->MTA conductor: Ladies and gentlemen, this train will be out of commission, uh...right now. Get out!<br/><br/>--MetroNorth Train<br/><br/>Overheard by: Kellin<br/><br/><!-- ID = 113056 -->Train conductor: Ladies and gentleman, brace for impact. (pause) Nah...just kidding, I could never pull that shit off. Y&#39;all lucky we underground! Have a safe day.<br/><br/>--A Train<br/><br/><br/>via <a href="http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/">Overheard in New York</a>, Feb 18, 2009