Overheard In New York http://www.overheardinnewyork.com Thu, 22 Jun 2017 20:39:25 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.5.9 We’ve Found Her Running Mate http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/004164.html Thu, 22 Jun 2017 20:39:25 +0000 Bike guy: Hey girl, I really like your red hair
Chick: Yeah, me too. That’s why I dye it. But I don’t like it nearly as much as I like not being interrupted when I am tryng to talk to someone. –St. Marks & 3rd Overheard by: ~dana

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Tell Me Your Name and We'll Go from There http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/017089.html Wed, 21 Jun 2017 20:38:19 +0000 Meathead #1: I am so getting my dick sucked by the end of the day.
Meathead #2: I'll make sure of it, dude.
Meathead #1: (silence) –Grand Central Overheard by: DrNels

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No Green Eggs and Ham, Please, Sam-I-Am http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/024994.html Tue, 20 Jun 2017 20:32:17 +0000 Diner: Can I also get the garden fresh salad?
Server: We don't have that anymore. Do you want the fresh garden salad?
Diner: Yes. –122nd St & Amsterdam

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Fool — Even Now the Eye of Sharon Turns in Our Direction! http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/009199.html Mon, 19 Jun 2017 20:30:54 +0000 Dude #1: I mean, when she walked into the room it was like… a demonic presence.
Dude #2: Yeah, I know what you mean.
Dude #1: No, you don’t. Your girlfriend isn’t like that. She’s not a bitch.
Dude #2: Yeah, she is, just in a different way. She’s a smart enough bitch not to let people know she’s a bitch. –NYC High School

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Pepé Le Pew’s Scentimental Wednesday One-Liners http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/012872.html Sun, 18 Jun 2017 20:26:48 +0000 Hobo: Hey, ladies. [Girls giggle.] You smell so good — like Campbell’s soup! –10th & Broadway Overheard by: Emily Man on cell: You tell your smelly sisters that they have to shower tonight. –39th & 5th Queer hipster to fag hag: Oh my god, his placenta stank! –N train Overheard by: Lauren Chick to friend: Shut up, or I’ll sniff you in a minute! –Central Park JAP: Ew, like — I like, washed my hair, like, this morning… Why does it, like, smell? Ewww… That’s sooo bimmey! –1 train Chipper thugette: I smell pussy! –L train, Bedford stop

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We Should Wager a Large Sum of Money on It http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/012746.html Sat, 17 Jun 2017 20:25:56 +0000 Male clerk, singing: … And one of these days these foots are gonna walk all over you.
Ghetto female clerk: Foots? It’s feets. –19th & Broadway

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I Heart New York (A Short Story) http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/012020.html Fri, 16 Jun 2017 20:20:33 +0000 Wheelbette: Excuse me, sir — do you have the time?
Guy: Shut up. –26th & 6th

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She Means the Greeks http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/004649.html Thu, 15 Jun 2017 20:17:04 +0000 Chick: How come we’re always talking about how the Jews were persecuted? Lots of people have been persecuted. My people have been persecuted, too.
Professor guy: Um…This is “Introduction to Jewish-American Literature”.
Chick: …Yeah, but still. –Waverly Building, Waverly Place

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What's My Motivation? http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/020816.html Wed, 14 Jun 2017 20:14:12 +0000 Eight-year-old to dad: Give me another acting exercise!
Dad: Try acting not weird. –46th St b/w 8th & 9th Overheard by: Serena

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Walt Whitman: *Swoons* http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/024793.html Tue, 13 Jun 2017 20:10:42 +0000 Security guard by exit: Baggage, baggage, baggage? Baggage claim this way.
International passenger #1: Baggage, baggage! Baggage claim this way!
International passenger #2: Baggage claim this way?
Security guard: Baggage baggage baggage?
International passenger #3: Baggage!
Security guard: Baggage claim this way. –Gate 20, Terminal 3, JFK

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