Overheard In New York http://www.overheardinnewyork.com Sun, 24 Jul 2016 01:45:16 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.5.3 … The Komodo Dragon, the Jello Stains, the Manslaughter Conviction… http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/013194.html Sun, 24 Jul 2016 01:45:16 +0000 Frat boy: Okay, guys, to recap: We’re not going to tell my parents about getting arrested, the Xanax, my nipples…
Other guys, in unison: Got it. –Canal & Lafayette Overheard by: klulita

He'll Feel Superior for About a Minute, Before He Realizes He's in Brooklyn http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/015876.html Sat, 23 Jul 2016 01:41:07 +0000 Train conductor: This is Atlantic Avenue. If you don't want to be left in the city get off now, if you are going to the city, buckle up… wooo hoooo!
Ghetto woman: This nigga lost his mind.
Ghetto child: Just like daddy?
Suit: Fucking morons! (walks off train) –Q Train Overheard by: Got Off On Atlantic

Listen, Laurel, I Take Enough Shit from You as It Is http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/008165.html Fri, 22 Jul 2016 01:40:06 +0000 Small man: Looks like you got a full lunch there.
Large man: Nah, just a donut, coffee, and a sandwich.
Small man: Oh, maybe just half a lunch then. [Pause] You should eat better.
Large man: Oh, I should, huh? –Broad St, Financial District

Wednesday One-Liners Had It As a Safety School http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/010029.html Thu, 21 Jul 2016 01:37:06 +0000 Asian chick: I’m just so sick of failing in general. –NYU Bobst Library Overheard by: jason NYU girl to friends: Well, he’s not always drunk. Sometimes he’s high. –Prince & Mercer NYU chick: I found out I didn’t have AIDS… I went to Whole Foods… It was a good day. –27th & Park Overheard by: It was a good day NYU bimbette: All popular people have herpes. Just look at them! –NYU NYU chick: Yeah, we almost broke up like four or five times, so I think that’s indicative that we’re happy together. –Bowery & Canal NYU girl on cell: I don’t know what to do about going abroad. My parents want me to go to London, but I looked at my Tarot cards and they’re telling me Dublin. What should I do? –721 Broadway Overheard by: Tyler Queer student: I don’t really have a problem with incest, but in my family there aren’t many lookers. –NYU Silver Center

That's Not a Lisp, It's Castilian http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/019912.html Wed, 20 Jul 2016 01:34:43 +0000 Smart girl: Well, he needs to check with his partner to see if we can have dogs in the apartment.
Hot guy: So, do you think he's gay?
Smart girl: No! He's Spanish. –Pelham Parkway & Cruger Ave, The Bronx Overheard by: Dazed and Confused

Then I Can’t Help You because You’re Not Real http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/012618.html Tue, 19 Jul 2016 01:33:00 +0000 Brit: Hello, my HSBC debit card isn’t working at the ATM. The bank probably thinks there’s fraudulent activity since I’m in America and not in England.
Teller: Okay, I’ll check it out… I can’t seem to find your account, sir. What’s your social security number?
Brit: Huh?
Teller: Your social security number — do you not have one?
Brit: No…
Teller: Hmmm. Okay… –HSBC, 40th & 5th Overheard by: Rachel W. Headline by: have SSS #, am real Runners-Up:
· “…Then Please Sing the National Anthem.” – pbump
· “How About Your Penis Size, Then?” – Mikey G.
· “I’ve Contacted Homeland Security. Enjoy Syria.” – Daniel Patterson
· “Okay I Need You to Fill Out IRS Form W-7 and Apply for a Tax Id Number and Then Come Back to This Counter in 4-6 Months.” – Ty
Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Meet the Poster Children for Bike Helmets http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/017852.html Mon, 18 Jul 2016 01:32:14 +0000 Kid on scooter: Where are the brakes on this?
Kid on scooter #2: What is “brakes?” –Sunset Park Overheard by: blistxaddict

Or, As Some Call Them, “Children” http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/001906.html Sun, 17 Jul 2016 01:29:24 +0000 Guy #1: It is so over, but he doesn’t know it yet.
Guy #2: Really?
Guy #1: Yeah. Too much wifey drama. –The Roxy, W. 18th Street Overheard by: Carlynn Houghton

“No, you should just get some Coke. Diet.” http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/001331.html Sat, 16 Jul 2016 01:28:21 +0000 Teen girl #1: Noooo! Getting your cooch pierced be a bad idea. You know how much that shit hurts?
Teen girl #2: No shit! That’s why I’m gonna be on E at the time. You think I’m stupid enough to do it sober? –Columbus Circle station Overheard by: Djlindee

Hey, Bra, Check Out These Sweet Wednesday One-Liners http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/015693.html Fri, 15 Jul 2016 01:26:25 +0000 Frat boy: That is the last time I am *ever* jacking off to gay porn. –Gristedes, 42nd St Overheard by: …while sober or drunk? Frat boy to another frat boy staring intently at a young woman dressed as a Hogwarts student: I am really drunk! –14th St & University Place Midwest frat dude: The ugliest girls in New York City are like the hottest girls I've ever seen! –St.Marks & 3rd Ave Overheard by: slohmie Frat boy: Dude, I'm not hating -I love gay guys. All I'm saying is -they buy a lot of Kosher wine. –23rd St & 7th Ave Overheard by: Dina Frat boy: We've had sex everywhere… In cars, in public places…I've seen her vagina more times than I've seen my mother's! –Wagner College