Overheard In New York http://www.overheardinnewyork.com Wed, 18 Jan 2017 12:30:29 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.5.5 Wednesday One-liners Wear Gross Sneakers http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/004268.html Wed, 18 Jan 2017 12:30:29 +0000 Hobo: Hold the train! I’m just going to go get some sugar for my coffee! –C train Overheard by: Jenn B

]]>
Rock, Dude. He'd Fucking Rock. http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/017016.html Tue, 17 Jan 2017 12:28:15 +0000 New wave boy: You're like Lou Reed with a vagina.
New wave girl: Since when did he not have one?
Random stoner friend: Hey, do you want to get Indian food!?
New wave girl: What would Lou Reed do? –2nd Ave &14th Overheard by: Mischa

]]>
Pictorial Illiteracy Can Be Fatal http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/020826.html Mon, 16 Jan 2017 12:26:06 +0000 Hispanic teen to friend: Yo, none of the danger signs are in Spanish! “Do not lean on the doors, do not hold the doors.” The city doesn't care if we fall off the train and die!
Friend: Then you guys better start looking at the fucking stick figures! –Uptown E Train Overheard by: Tara

]]>
They Got the Dental Records? Seriously? http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/009975.html Wed, 11 Jan 2017 12:07:32 +0000 Idiot #1: … And that’s why they call him Ted Kaczynski, because he bit her on the ass.
Idiot #2: Really?
Idiot #1: Yeah, they got the dental records and everything. He totally bit her on the ass, and there were bite marks. That’s why they call him Ted Kaczynski. –61st & 10th

]]>
From The Weakest Link: Classroom Version http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/018861.html Tue, 10 Jan 2017 12:03:13 +0000 Professor: So if we were to write a speech on the American Civil War, what could some topics be?
Student: The different countries involved? –Pace University

]]>
I Prefer Mutes, But That’s Not Really a Fetish http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/000952.html Mon, 09 Jan 2017 12:01:33 +0000 Businessman: …and once word gets out that you like to fuck girls with no legs, everybody thinks you’re a freak!
Crony: Yeah, I bet.
Businessman: I’ll send you the pictures. –Maiden Lane & Water St. Overheard by: Dave Kelleher

]]>
And the Fact That They're Douchebags Creates Lubrication http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/018709.html Sun, 08 Jan 2017 11:56:50 +0000 Dude in crowded subway car, to friend he's showing around town: That's why hipsters are all so thin, so they can move easily through trains.
Friend: So, is that, like, a requirement here?
Dude: Yeah, there's a practical reason for it. –R Train Overheard by: Morning Glory

]]>
Tell Me More, Tell Me More, Did She Shit Very Far? http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/017318.html Sat, 07 Jan 2017 11:56:36 +0000 Young JAP: So I heard they were doing anal at this party and he hit this nerve in her ass, and she started shitting all over her mom's bed.
Random guy, muttering: That's soooooo hot. –1 Train Overheard by: ugh

]]>
When Regular Dudes Try to Pretend They're Hugh Hefner, They Inevitably Just Come Off As Creepy http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/019517.html Fri, 06 Jan 2017 11:50:51 +0000 Construction guy #1, in thick New York accent: Hey, Harry!
Construction guy #2: Yeah?
Construction guy #1: I'm havin' a pajama party at my house tonight, you wanna come over? –53rd & 3rd

]]>
What Brand, Damn It, What Brand? http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/009574.html Thu, 05 Jan 2017 11:48:32 +0000 Girl to friend: I can’t decide which brand of shampoo and conditioner I want this time.
Random shopper, pointing to bottle: Get this kind. It made my pubes soft and wispy. –CVS Pharmacy, Union Square Overheard by: hoken chong

]]>