Overheard In New York http://www.overheardinnewyork.com Thu, 25 Aug 2016 03:20:49 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.5.3 Coincidentally, He Doesn’t Consider It Cheating When It’s with a Guy http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/013898.html Thu, 25 Aug 2016 03:20:49 +0000 Girl #1: Are you gonna tell him?
Girl #2: Well, I don’t consider it cheating when it’s with a girl… so no. –23rd & 7th Overheard by: vaduz

That Is to Say, I Will Cling Tightly to Your Secret http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/007060.html Wed, 24 Aug 2016 03:19:32 +0000 Girl #1: I mean, don’t tell him I told you that. You can’t tell him I said anything, or he will flip his shit.
Girl #2: It’s Vagina Night! –Rivington & Orchard

A Long Time Ago, Baby. Now Fuck Off. http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/019565.html Tue, 23 Aug 2016 03:16:58 +0000 White man: You going to church too?
Black woman: Yes.
White man: You know, I just started crying last week at service. It is so powerful.
Black woman: I know.
White man: I mean, our next President will be the last President before the Antichrist comes. Are you ready to be saved? –Foster Ave & Marlborough Rd, Brooklyn

Wednesday One-Liners Pretend They’ve Read Kerouac http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/015525.html Sun, 14 Aug 2016 02:52:27 +0000 Hipster chick: It costs like $280 to go blonde, which seems expensive but it’s totally worth it because then you’re blonde. –Hop Scotch Overheard by: bildita Hipster: My brother entitled all of his college essays "Heeeey Essaaaaay!" –Smith Street & President Overheard by: Michelle C. (drunk or ill hipster guy lying on stairs moans pitifully and vomits)
Hipster’s friend, looking away and pretending not to know him: Ha! Fag! –7th Ave Young hipster: Let’s face it, at some point I’m gonna be homeless. –Union Square Overheard by: Conti Hipster girl: Pickles are so in right now. –Renegade Arts Festival, Williamsburg

I Hope She Doesn’t Hanker for a Seeing-Eye Dog http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/002229.html Sat, 13 Aug 2016 02:49:10 +0000 Black chick: Yeah, I broke my sister’s knee with a baseball bat.
White chick: Wow, me and my sister had some bad fights but your’s top all our fights. You must really hate each other.
Black chick: No, I did it out of love.
White chick: What do you mean?
Black chick: My sister’s in the Army Reserve. They called her unit up to go to Iraq. I hit her on purpose so she wouldn’t have to go. I had to hit her twice to make sure her knee was broken. –Tillary Street, Downtown Brooklyn

Plus, They Cooked Their Own http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/022166.html Fri, 12 Aug 2016 02:43:44 +0000 Middle aged man: I feel as though methamphetamines don't destroy your mind so much as ruin your body and make you cover it in tattoos. It's not like they were on heroin.
Companion, nodding his head: Mmm-hmm. –5th St & 19th St

Wednesday How Many Liners? http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/022926.html Thu, 11 Aug 2016 02:41:35 +0000 Cute guy to German flight attendant on layover: So, do you have cars in Germany? –Barracuda Overheard by: barkeeper Girl: So, my mom is Jewish and my dad is Christian. Does that make me, like, bi-racial? –Eugene Lang College Overheard by: Still ashamed I go to school here Hispanic high school girl: Is the Fourth of July always on a Friday? –N Train Overheard by: D-Law Guy to friend: Well, that's nice, they have these machines set up for the visually impaired, but what about the deaf people? –ATM, 38th St & Madison Ave Overheard by: jennyooooo Student: Is Swedish even a language? –Columbia University Trucker: What are you, stupid, or both? –M86 Crosstown Bus

And I Never Had Kids of My Own http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/011526.html Wed, 10 Aug 2016 02:36:39 +0000 Old lady #1: Why are you dating a 30-year-old guy?
Old lady #2: … Well, he just got a haircut. –Union Square East, 15th St Overheard by: Steve Scalici

Steinbrenner: That’s the Last Time I Use a Hobo as my Wingman http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/008326.html Tue, 09 Aug 2016 02:30:12 +0000 Ranting man: Fuck George Steinbrenner now, fuck George Steinbrenner now!
Passerby: But why?
Ranting man: Don’t be an idiot! Because tomorrow will be too late! Fuck George Steinbrenner now! –Broadway & 63rd Overheard by: Mark

It's Pronounced “Canadia” http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/016487.html Mon, 08 Aug 2016 02:28:21 +0000 Son: It is cold, like Canada!
Mom: You've never been to Canada.
Daughter: Don't talk about Canada. –Spanish Harlem Overheard by: Jaina