I'm a Lucky Gal

Guy, pointing to Empire State Building: Blue, baby!
Girl: (smiles and shrugs)
Guy: I bet you don't even know why it's blue. That's because you are not a New Yorker and you're only here to get drunk and get your vag pounded!
Girl: (looks at him and smiles)

--Madison Square Park


Posted 2012-02-03 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

He Had a Lot Of Queens in Him.

Middle school kid #1, doing homework: Yo, where was Socrates from?
Middle school kid #2: Astoria.

--6 Train


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Wouldn't Mind Creating Some Covalent Bonds with Her!

Student #1: Dude, our chemistry TA is so hot.
Student #2: Agreed. I have to hide my boner with my lab notebook.
Student #1: I knocked over a test tube with mine.

--Madison Square Garden

Overheard by: James Hancock


Posted 2012-02-02 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

That's Just the Way Some Runners Roll.

Bleeding biker, after falling while trying to avoid runner that ran in front of him: Ugh... (in pain and shock)
Inconsiderate and completely unharmed runner that ran in front of a biker in the bike lane: Fuck you!

--Central Park Bike Lane


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Girls, in Short.

Short girl to taller friend trying on jeans: Who in the world is suppose to fit these? What long legged creature was this made for?
Friend, seeing tall modelesque girl passing by: Well, I guess her?
Short girl: I'm not jealous!
Friend: Yes you are!
Shorter girl: Maybe just a little.

--Barneys New York

Overheard by: Izzy


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Ooo, or Club Sandwiches!

Comedy club advertiser: Do you like comedy clubs?! Come...
Teen girl with friend, interrupting: No, we like strip clubs.

--Times Square


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That's Cold, Dude.

Wife: Honey, let's get dippin' dots!
Husband: No, I don't want dippin' dots, they've been the "ice cream of the future" for ten years!

--Yankee Stadium

Overheard by: Stefanie


Posted 2012-02-02 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

You'd Prefer the Mitt Romney Cervical Cap?

Guy on the street: Getcher Obama condoms!
Teenage daughter: Mom, want an Obama condom?
Mother, snarling: I hate Obama.

--Broadway & Prince St

Overheard by: laptopkitty


Posted 2012-02-02 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

What, You've Never Been to NYU's Self Center?

Guy: You're a very self-centered person!
Coworker: Crossing lines, dude! Crossing. Lines.

--NYU


Posted 2012-02-02 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Clueless White People, Represent!

Young woman #1: Wow, that's a great tan! Were you on vacation?
Young woman #2: Um... I'm black.
Young woman #1: You totally are! So, was it like, Jamaica or something?
Young woman #2: (...)

--Midtown

Overheard by: Fashionista


Posted 2012-02-02 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Ew, There's Shit on It?

Midday Sunday drunken bum #1: What you got goin' on man? What you got?
Midday Sunday drunken bum #2: I ain't got shit.
Midday Sunday drunken bum #1: Come on, man...
Midday Sunday drunken bum #2: I ain't got nothin' but my dick.

--42nd & 9th

Overheard by: Matt


Posted 2012-02-02 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

At This Point, Things Started to Get Grizzly.

Woman trying to order off-menu Greek takeout: Yes, can I have a hor... I... Tiki... Salad...
Big Greek man taking order, quickly: Horiatiki salata, yes. Next?
Woman: Um, can I add grilled chicken to it?
Greek man, looking surprised: Chicken? Do you know what horiatiki is?
Woman: No.
Greek man: It's bayer.
Woman: Bayer?
Greek man: Yes, bayer. Bayer.
Woman: I don't under...
Woman's husband, chiming in: "Bare". It comes bare babe. With nothing on it.
Greek man: No. No. Bayer. Huge huge...
Woman: Bear? Like the animal?
Greek man: Yes. Yes. Bear.
Woman: Oh, okay. No thanks.

--30th Ave & 34th St

Overheard by: melissa


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